


The Wolf And The Lamb

by Owlisout_0130



Series: A Spark From The Old World [1]
Category: Fallout 3, Fallout 4, Fallout: New Vegas
Genre: Action/Adventure, Angst with a Happy Ending, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Child Death, Dominance, Dreams and Nightmares, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Falling In Love, Lust, Mental Health Issues, Revenge, Self-Sacrifice, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-16
Updated: 2018-11-02
Packaged: 2019-08-03 06:49:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 10
Words: 22,496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16321202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Owlisout_0130/pseuds/Owlisout_0130
Summary: After being frozen for 200 years, Saoirse has become an experienced waste lander and known hero of the capital wasteland. Five years later after everything, she finds herself stuck in Zion with a new alias doing what she does best, helping people. How will she be able to escape her past and control these new feelings that arise? Will she be able to help Joshua calm his demons? One thing is certain though, hers are not to be negotiated with.





	1. Chapter one

Boone had his rifle pointed at the two praetorian guards kneeling on the ground. Saoirse was surprised he hadn’t blown their heads off already. Arcade was on the side of Saoirse leaning in suggesting what they did with this sadistic leader kneeling before them. The only legionary that was not being held captive was Vulpes. Instead, He was standing next to Saoirse removing his legion armor. Caesar's eyes were burning into the legionary that had betrayed him. In fact, Vulpes was such a good frumentarii that no one in the legion had expected him to be working with Saoirse the whole time as her spy.

“We should just shoot him and get it done with.” Boone said.

Saoirse contemplated for a moment. She wanted him to suffer, Caesar didn’t do anything personal towards her, but she didn’t take kindly to him enslaving and killing people.

“Edward Sallow.” She said trying to get his attention.

He broke his gaze from Vulpes abruptly to look at her. “You have committed unspeakable crimes against the people of the Mohave. Your punishment is death by scaphism.” She stated in a professional manor.

No one interjected, and everyone had not a single speck of remorse on their faces for this sad man.

“You are familiar with Roman history, yes?” Saoirse added. She then kneeled to his level. She had a small interested smile on her face. “Then you should know all about the Persians then and how they punished people.” She said.

BOOM!

BOOM!

Everyone turned to Boone with surprise.

“Really Boone? You couldn’t wait?” Arcade said giving him an annoyed look.

Both guards fell to the ground. She was still looking in Boones direction as he raised his gun towards Saoirse. She had a look of confusion and turned to see Caesar with a black hole and a stream of blood on his forehead, his arm was still raised up with a knife. It all happened so slow yet so fast. Saoirse stood up and turned to Boone.

“You trigger happy son of a bitch, it was getting good!” Saoirse paused. “But thank you.” She said in a softer voice.

Boone lowered his gun. “He was about to kill you. We don’t have time for this bullshit.” He said in his normal grumpy tone.

“I suppose your right, but it’s a shame he had a quick and painless death. Specially with all the pain he caused people.” She said sadly.

“He won’t be able to hurt anyone else now thanks to you though” Vulpes said looking at Saoirse.

“Whoa, I didn’t do it. We all did. If it wasn’t for you guys I wouldn’t have- “. Arcade cut her off.

“Please! The legion has been around for decades and then a year ago Mr. New Vegas exclaims that a young red-headed girl waltz in here and takes out all the legionaries at cottonwood cove? I knew then that you were her. That the lone wanderer has finally made her way to Vegas. Without you none of this would be going on right now.”

***************************************************************************************

Saoirse snapped out of her flashback. She was sitting on a large rock that was just above stream level. The water was always colder in the Narrows. Her feet were starting to get wrinkly from being in the water for too long, so she took them out and sat Indian style. Saoirse had been thinking about the moment they killed Caesar more frequently. Ever since she met Joshua and got more acquainted she could understand his anger. She could see that look in his eyes, the same look she had many years ago when she was just sixteen. She felt so much regret for taking that moment away from Joshua. She heard water splashing behind her but didn’t care to look back. Saoirse was too carefree and too impulsive for her own good. She wondered how she made it this far being the way she is. Having a prewar mental condition in a post-apocalyptic world wasn’t ideal, but she swooped up as many mentants she could find to feel normal.

The splashing got closer and soon she saw black pants hiked up to the knees and bare feet. She knew it was arcade before looking at the face. He always hated getting his shoes and clothes wet or dirty. Arcade sat down next to Saoirse and placed his shoes behind him.

“Have you decided who your siding with?” he asked curiously.

“Yes.” She said softly.

Saoirse got up and began walking back to camp with him. They spoke for a while until the sky started to get dark. She was glad he accompanied her to Zion. She protested for anyone to come along, but he managed to sneak his way and followed her to the northern passage. As they got closer to camp, all the sorrows were having a tribal gathering. Her and arcade watched from afar for a while as the tribals danced.

“Missing him?” She asked.

 “Wha-? OH, yeah, I forgot I told you about that. I panicked for a moment.” He said nervously.

“Don’t worry I’m not going to run around telling people about that.” She laughed and reassured him.

“Yeah, I don’t think his family would approve.” He said.

“Why are you and him nervous?” She looked at him curiously. “I mean, they will find out eventually.”

“Yeah, But just not now. Not with everything going on. We will wait till things calm down.” He said. “Why don’t you go over and spend some time with YOUR FRIEND.” He said sarcastically.

Saoirse turned and saw Joshua sitting on a log reading his bible near the celebration.

She turned quickly and red in the face. “Really? He is just a good friend, nothing more.” She said quickly.

She started to walk towards the sorrows and arcade matched her pace easily. Most people could easily catch up to her. Saoirse always felt so short next to anyone she stood by, she stood maybe 5'3".

“You may not see it that way, but I’m sure someone else does.” He said.

Saoirse stopped and gave Arcade an odd look.

“I see the way he looks at you.” He said.

“And what is that suppose to mean? Joshua could just find me uhm interesting.” She whispered loudly.

“You are so oblivious.” Arcade says shaking his head and smiling.

She narrowed her eyes at him and pursed her lips.

“Well, speak of the devil” arcade gave a long grin and walked past her towards the entrance.

She was still facing outward and froze. She didn’t know what it was about him. Whether it was his voice or presence that messed with her head. She was very fond of the man despite his past, but even if Arcade was right, she was a mess. She knew no one would be able to handle her, but when she looked into those artic blue eyes she felt something call her.

*************************************************

She remembered back to the first week when she had just arrived in Zion. Her and Arcade had escaped the white legs just in time. They were offered a place to stay in the cave at dead horse camp. Arcade took them up on the offer, but Saoirse declined and decided to stay in a nearby cave for the night. She explained to Joshua she had night terrors and didn’t want to burden anyone at night. “It’s too dangerous to be sleeping alone out there.

You need to stay here.” He protested in a calm tone. “You can stay in my room if you want, you won’t bother me. I don’t sleep much these days anyway”. He said.

Saoirse oddly agreed. She didn’t usually have anyone tell her what to do, but she did what he said without question. The first night in his room was awkward, and most of the night she did not sleep. He brought her a big horner hide and a blanket. It was the softest thing she had ever laid on. Most of the night she stared at the wall or ceiling. She heard pages being turned which told her he couldn’t sleep as well. Saoirse always had issues with sleep ever since waking up in this world 200 years later. It was not completely dark in there, she could still see Joshua’s face turned downward in his bible.

“Could you read to me?” She said softly.

He paused for a moment before looking at her. He then returned his eyes to the book and began reading out loud. His voice was soft and low, she decided to get into a fetal position and bring the blankets up just past her shoulders. Even though she was an atheist it was still nice to hear something so pure. She still respected religion, but she could never bring herself to believe in a god when there were so many of them.

Within minutes she was asleep, and Joshua admired her for a few moments. Her porcelain skin glistened against the fire, he knew she would never want someone like him especially with how he looked underneath his bandages. He would only bring someone as pure as her down. He returned to his book and thought of the what-ifs.

Not an hour later Saoirse woke up screaming. Complete fear filled her face as she opened her eyes grabbing for something or someone. He jolted to her bedside and rested his hands her shoulders. She grabbed his forearm, breathing heavy and felt her heart racing ready to burst out of her chest. She collected herself once she knew where she was and who she was with.

“You weren’t kidding about the night terrors. Do you know why you have these?” He asked her worried.

She felt embarrassed, she ignored the question and sat up. “Sorry, I wish I wasn’t like this. That’s why I wanted to sleep away so no one would have to deal with them.” She said quickly.

She looked exhausted. She leaned her back against a rock that was near her bedside and brought her knees to her chest. Joshua sat down next to her on the bed and motioned her to lean against him. She blushed and felt flutters in her chest, this was an odd and new emotion to her. She hesitated for a moment, but soon leaned against him and laid her head on his chest. He wrapped his one arm around her and began to read to her. Saoirse could have swore he was caressing her hair with his free hand, but she was too tired to care. Again, she was out soon after he began and for the first time in five years she had slept without a single nightmare.

***************************************************

Saoirse broke from the thought and turned around to walk towards Joshua. “Good evening, Six. How are you?” He asked.

“I’m doing good.” She paused. “Your right about the white legs. They need to be stopped.” She said quickly and nervously.

Joshua gave her a small nod. “I’m glad you agree. I just wish I could make Daniel see reason. That I am not bloodthirsty as I once was, but I will not run away and give my land up for those animals.” He said sternly.

She crossed her arms. “Even if he doesn’t agree, they should still be taken care of, but I’m unsure why they are still pursuing you especially after I killed Cae—” Saoirse stopped abruptly, and her eyes widened.

_Shit._

Joshua narrowed his eyes at her and tilted his head leaning in. “What did you- “Joshua added

“I killed so many of their white legs. Sorry, it’s been a long night. I am going to talk to Daniel tomorrow when I give him the map” She said quickly. He was still giving her a weird look. Saoirse smiled and began to walk away. “I’ll see you back at Angel Cave!” She yelled walking away.

She got no reply and when she looked back she saw him still standing in the same position she left him in, watching her walk away. Saoirse felt panic in her chest.

 _Damnit, I really need to be more careful_.

It took an hour before Saoirse made it to the dead horses’ camp. She saw follows chalk, Arcade and other dead horses sitting by the fire in deep conversation. She wanted to motion Arcade to talk to him in private about her mix up, but instead, Saoirse sat down on a log warming her hands near the fire. She looked up to the sky, Saoirse never noticed how bright the stars were out in Zion. She couldn’t remember the last time she looked up searching for the stars. 

_There’s Draco, minor, and major Ursa too._

She wanted to point out to her friends the constellations but figured it would only raise more questions. Saoirse had a brief memory of camping with her father and him telling her what each one was called. She banished the thought as quick as it came in. Saoirse and her dad were close, he was all she had and vice versa. Sadly, his memory is too painful to think about even if it has been years since his death. She felt a fire start to burn in her chest and took a deep breath.

“You okay?” Arcade asked. Saoirse was startled and looked at him.

“Yeah, just a headache. It’s been a long day.” She said.

After a moment Saoirse got up and began to walk into Angel cave for sleep. She could see why Arcade expected something to be going on between her and Joshua. The fact that she was sleeping in the same room as him was enough for anyone to think anything. Sleeping next to him became a nightly thing, but that was it. 

_He is only helping me sleep, surely that’s all he thinks this is. Just a friend helping a friend._

Saoirse always had to reassure herself about these thoughts. After a few nights of sleeping in his den, she eventually got comfortable and would wrap her arms around him. He didn't seem to mind and his scent was intoxicating. Though, last night she started to get a pulse between her legs that made her uncomfortable when his fingertips lightly moved down her shoulder.

_I have to stop this, if what arcade is saying is true I can’t let him catch feelings about me. I will break it to him slowly and hopefully, that will end it._

Saoirse walked into Angel cave and up the winding hallway to his den. She noticed he was already here. She didn’t even notice him come back to dead horse camp. Joshua was sitting on her bed with a book on his lap. He had the blanket folded open and patted the bed where she usually lays. Everything she had thought about five minutes ago disintegrated. Saoirse laid down and wrapped her arms around Joshua listening to him read and forgetting about the world for the night.

She always woke up earlier than anyone. She usually laid in bed until Joshua woke up. She knew he was a light sleeper and didn’t want to wake him. This morning she decided to look up at him, to her surprise he was already looking down at her. She froze then glanced away quickly feeling her face flush.

“Good morning.” He said standing up and walking towards his desk.

Saoirse thought it was odd he walked and then stood in the middle of the room facing away. Joshua crossed his arm like he was deep in thought. As he turned around he brought his thumb and pointer to his temple.

“I need some answers from you.” He said in an even tone. His eyes glanced up to hers. Saoirse froze, she didn’t know what to say. She knew he was on to her and she has no other choice.


	2. Chapter 2

Saoirse stood up and ran her fingers through her hair and played with the ends. Joshua’s glare began to get more intense and less patient. She tried to play stupid with a weak smile “What do you want to know?”. 

“What is your real name for starters.” He demanded calmly.

Joshua took a few steps towards her and in sync, Saoirse stepped back. He began to look annoyed.

“Six.” She said quietly.

“Your name is not six.” He huffed. “How can I sleep next to someone I can’t trust to give me their real name? For all, I know you could be here to kill me. You could pose a threat to my people and I will do whatever it takes to keep them safe.” He said sternly placing a hand on his hip where his gun was holstered.

“Look!” She said defensively “This is too complicated to explain. The last thing I want to do is have your people hurt and I’m keeping certain things to myself so that doesn’t happen.” She pleaded.

Unfortunately, it had made things worse. Joshua was even more suspicious of her. “You need to tell me everything,” He paused. “Or you need to leave”.

“Fine.” She said coldly. He relaxed expecting to get more information. Saoirse turned and grabbed her duffle bag and sniper and turned quickly to walk out of his den. 

“What are you doi- You can’t just walk out of here.” He demanded.

She turned confused, “You told me to leave, It’s for everyone’s best interest.” She said turning away and walking down the hall.  
She made her way to the mouth of the cave and was walking hastily to the stream. Arcade saw the pained look on her face and ran to catch up with her.

“Where the hell are you going? Did he do anything to you?” He asked trying to block her from going any further. “I have to leave Arcade, you know the reason why.” She said in a low tone. She paused and looked back at the camp seeing Follows-chalk standing at the edge of the water staring at them in confusion. “You should stay though. Don’t let my issues take you away from something that makes you happy.” She said. He looked at her with a hesitation. 

“I can’t let you just walk out there alone.” He said in a low voice.

“I’ll be fine, I’ve made it this far.” She said with a small smile. 

She looked back to the camp and saw Joshua erupt from the mouth of the cave. He started to walk towards them. “Take care of yourself.” She said quickly giving her friend a big hug and walked away. Arcade had watched his best friend walk out into the wild. He began to walk back to camp and while looking back to see if he could still see her, suddenly he felt something tug at the neck of his shirt roughly. He turned quickly to see Joshua grabbing him and staring into his eyes with anger. 

“Joshua! What are you doing?!” Follows-Chalk exclaimed with his arms up unsure what to do. 

“Uhm, Uh, Can I help you?!” Arcade said sarcastically with some fear in his voice.

“What is her deal? You’re going to tell me everything.” Joshua hissed. Arcade didn’t want to betray his friend, but he also didn’t want to be killed. Arcade began to feel sweat stream down his face. Joshua tightened his grip on Arcades lab coat.

“She’s the lone wanderer!”

Arcade didn’t expect Joshua to believe him. Joshua stared into his eyes for a few seconds and let him go darting for the stream. 

Saoirse figured this was for the best, she noticed she was getting to close to him. She didn’t want to become dependent on someone else let alone for sleep. Saoirse is going to miss Arcade the most and oddly Joshua as well too. She pulled a map out of her pack to navigate from Zion to the Mohave but pulled the wrong one out.

“DAMMIT!” She exclaimed.

_I forgot to give Daniel the map! Ugh, Should I go back to Angels landing or The Narrows?_

She paused and turned around looking at the land in front of her. Saoirse was already at the Zion welcome booth. 

_I suppose I will go to the Narrows and give this to Daniel himself and say my goodbyes._

Saoirse turned around and walked a few feet past the welcome booth when she met eyes with a Yao guai. The beast lifted its head and look in her direction. It started to huff and smack the dirt around with its big paws. _Damn Yogi Bears._ Shortly the bear darted for Saoirse and she turned quickly and started sprinting towards the welcome booth before getting her leg clawed. She did a summersault into the small shack and groaned in pain. She backed into the corner of the hut holding her wound. The Yao Guais shoulders were too big to get through the small door thankfully, but when he waved his paws in the building his sharp claws were inches away. 

_Shit, my gun must of fell._

The wood around the door started to crack. Saoirse didn’t fear death much. In fact, she thought very little of her safety. She wasn’t sure if it was the adrenaline or to see how far she could push her luck. 

Suddenly, the yao guais head fumbled on the floor of the building and Saoirse screamed. “GAH, What the fuck!” 

The yao guais head was cut clean off. Saoirse didn’t move an inch and waited to see who or what killed this monstrous beast in one clean hit. A few moments went by when Joshua came into view. Blood specks covered his sleeves and bandages. He was holding a long samurai sword and kicked the giant beast to the side like it was nothing. 

“Are you hurt?” He asked. 

Saoirse was still in awe “Yeah, no, no I’m fine.”Joshua looked down to her leg and then back to her eyes.

“It’s nothing, Thank you.” She looked at the ground and furrowed her brows. “Why are you here?” looking up at Joshua.

He stepped inside the building and kneeled beside her. “You need to get this taken care of.” He said looking at her deep wound on her calf.

“Oh, so now you’re going to ignore me now because I wouldn’t tell you anything”. She rolled her eyes.

He looked up at her but did not answer. He quickly scooped her up and walked out of the building. Saoirse blushed “Wha- What are you doing? I am perfectly capable of walking. I’m leaving anyway. Put me down! Joshua!” He ignored every word she said and kept walking his way back to Angels Landing. She tried to squirm her way down, but her leg seared in pain so for the remainder of the trip she crossed her arms and kept an irritated look on her face.

“Oh my god!” Arcade said loudly with shock on his face and rushing over to his wounded friend. “It’s just a small scratch Arc- “Saoirse said before she was interrupted. “Yeah, okay! I knew I should of went with you.” He sounded guilty and ran his hands through his hair as he examined her wound.

Joshua had placed her right back on her bed and left. Saoirse looked around to see if anyone was around and leaned in towards Arcade “What did you say to him?!”  
She whispered loudly. Arcade looked down to the ground “I told him who you were. I... I’m sorry he looked angry. He’s…intimidating you know! I’m sorry.” Arcade seemed ashamed.

“It’s fine. If it wasn't for you telling him I would probably be dead.” She rested her hand on his forearm. She smiled softly “He’s a big ol’bully though.” He returned her smile.

“Okay, Let’s get this taken care of. Do you want the stim pack before I stitch it up or after?” He asked looking unsure.

“I don’t know, you know more about this than I do.” She laughed.

“I’m a researcher remember? Not a doctor.” He said.

Saoirse sighed. “It doesn’t matter then I suppose.”

As soon as Arcade dug into his bag they heard footsteps coming up the hall. It was a tribal woman, she was carrying a basket full of various items. Her head was shaved, and she had different types of tattoos. She kneeled and smiled at Saoirse. Arcade spoke their language so when he began speaking their tongue she had no idea what they were talking about. She saw Arcade nod a few times like she was explaining something to him.

He finally looked down at her “This is Bright-Star-Shining She is going to take care of your wounds. To be honest, she will probably do a better job than me.” He said.

Bright-Star-Shining took out a dark liquid and poured it into a cup and motioned Saoirse to drink it. She took the cup and looked at the contents, it smelled almost like alcohol, but chemically too. Saoirse looked back at the healer, she was smiling. Saoirse decided to get this over with and chugged the drink. Bright-Star-Shining took the glass and began to pull other items out of her basket. Saoirse immediately started to panic when she started to feel funny.

_They poisoned me._

She started to try and get up, but the healer and arcade urged her to lay down and relax. Saoirse started to feel weak and dizzy, so she stayed down. At that moment she looked over to the opening of the den to see Joshua leaning against the wall with his arms folded. Saoirse’s vision started to blur and saw the man’s figure begin to walk towards her. She didn’t know what to do, for some reason without thinking she reached her hand out to the figure. She felt someone grab her hand and then it was all black.

Saoirse heard loud sloshing sounds and felt the warmth of the sun. She opened her eyes and lifted her head. She was on an island, and there was no boat, or anyone else. The water was a beautiful blue color and the warm sun’s rays beamed down on her pale skin. There were palm trees just like the ones she saw when she went to Florida with her father. She sat up and thought for a moment. _How the hell did I get here?_ She stood and spun around confused, looking for any types of clue. She stopped and breathed in the salty air and looked at the ocean. She loved the ocean, she missed it so much, but it wasn’t the same since the day the bombs dropped. She noticed the sky getting dark like a storm was coming. _I should probably find a shelter or something._ She turned around to see everyone that was at Dead horse camp and the Narrows. They were sitting around various fires and doing the daily task. She saw Arcade giggling with Follows-Chalk, Daniel and Joshua and other tribals looked to be having a bible study. She thought it was odd they appeared out of nowhere. She heard loud thunder behind her, she looked back to the ocean to see multiple venti birds coming to the island. The humming got louder, she knew who they were. She turned and began to run back to her friends. She couldn’t run fast enough; her legs were sinking in the sand and water. She tried to yell, but nothing came out, the humming got louder and louder. Soon she saw men in black power armor falling from the venti birds with guns aimed at everyone. Everyone was oblivious to them, Saoirse tried to scream and tell everyone to run or fight, still nothing. She tried to escape the sand but sank in more. The sand had taken almost all of her except her right arm and was up to her neck. She saw the enclave raise their weapons and to her horror she watched all her friends get slaughtered. There was nothing she could do and at that moment the sand engulfed her.  


Saoirse woke up with less pain than she did yesterday, she felt well rested, so she knew Joshua had slept next to her last night. He must already be awake she thought. She remembered Daniels map. Saoirse got up and was able to walk normally with no pain.

_Arcade must have given me a stimpak if my leg feels this good._

She glanced around the room and found her pip-boy laying on her bag along with her sniper rifle leaning against the wall. While looking at her pip-boy she noticed the time was off and blurry. 

_The scuffle must have messed with something. I’ll have to look at it later._

She dug through her bag and grabbed the map and her rifle. She started to make her way down the winding hall to the mouth of Angel cave. Saoirse looked around outside and searched for Joshua, no sign. She didn’t even see Arcade, a matter of fact she didn’t see anyone.  
She walked out of the cave looking around, _that’s odd at least one person would be here._ She started walking towards the stream to leave Angels landing when she saw the water start to turn an odd orange color. She paused and watched the stream run darker and darker. She looked towards the entrance and panic began to fill her. She followed the bloody stream, as she turned a corner she saw Arcade face down in the bloody water. Words couldn’t escape her, she ran to her friend’s side turning him over. She cradled his head in her arms, he was alive and looking at her “Oh my god….Arcade…What happened?” Saoirse could barely make out the words.

“Why did you let us all die?” Arcades face became angry “This is all your fault!”

Suddenly he grabbed Saoirse by the throat and began choking her. She began to panic and squirmed out of Arcades grip. She pushed away and fell back. She crawled back to the rock wall. Arcades body became limp again like a puppet, Saoirse felt tears fall down her face. 

Saoirse woke up in a panic screaming and sweat all over her. She looked around to see where she was. Saoirse plugged her nose to make sure she wasn’t in another nightmare. She was alone in the den, she wasn’t sure what time it was. She noticed she was in new clothes, and her pip boy was gone. She sat up in her bed and examined her outfit. She was wearing a dark green sundress. Where are my clothes? Saoirse wanted her jeans, hat, bandana, and shirt back. Her hair was loose and flowing down her back. This felt awkward for her, even at night while she slept and kept her hat on and refused to take it off. 

She looked down at her leg, it was patched up and a bandage was covering it. Saoirse still felt groggy and attempted to stand. She fumbled and fell on her knees shortly after she got to her feet. She sat there for a while reflecting on the nightmare she remembered clear as day. She knew she had to get out of here.

“What are you doing?!” She glanced over to see Arcade and Follows-chalk rush in next to her.

“I need to leave. Where is my stuff? What the hell did she give me?” She said angerly and confused.

Arcade rested his hand on her shoulder. “Relax, it was something to help you sleep while she fixed you up, she undressed you as well, so she could wash your clothes too,” Arcade explained. Saoirse calmed down for a moment. She sat against her bed and brought her knees to her chest looking at the ground. 

“You’re not going anywhere like this.” She heard the deep voice from the other end of the room. Saoirse didn’t have to look to see who it was. Follows-Chalk stood up from kneeling and motioned Arcade to leave with him. Arcade gave her a reassuring look and got up to leave.

Once they left foot steps walked to the other side of the room. Joshua walked over with a chair and sat in it backward with his arms folded. She could feel his eyes on her, she was being stubborn and choosing not to look at him.

“We can’t help you if you don’t tell me anything.” He said.

She looked up at him in surprise and amusement. “Help me? I don’t want your help. I was supposed to help you and then be on my way, but no you had to be Mr. nosey.” She said giving him an annoyed look.

“Mr. Nosey?” he asked raising one eyebrow.

“It means when you’re into someone business, you know, being nosey.” She paused, He still had a confused look on his face. “Just forget it” She lowered her head and pushed her face into her palms. “This is over your head, Joshua. You need to leave it alone and let it be my problem.” She demanded and raised her head trying to give him an intimidating look.

He had a look of amusement on his face. “We are new Canaanites Six, we help anyone we can, especially someone who is returning the favor.” He said.

“I almost became a bears lunch how is that helping you.” She said.

Saoirse could see his eyes wander down her. She thought it was odd, she was only wearing a plain green dress. Panic filled her as she realized sitting with your knees to your chest in a dress wasn’t very ladylike. She quickly dropped her legs and felt her face become red. Joshua moved his eyes away from her and let out a small awkward cough. She winced in pain when her calf hit the ground.

“Are you in pain?” He asked.

“No, I’m fine.” He gave her a suspicious look. “Okay, It’s a tiny bit sore, but it’s fine.” She said. 

There was a moment of silence. 

“So, it’s true? You’re the lone wanderer?” He asked. 

“Unfortunately, you...you can’t tell people what you know…about who I am. I have a lot of bad people still looking for me.” She said softly.

“Who is looking for you? He asked.

Saoirse didn’t answer and looked at the wall.

He just stared at her not saying a word for a moment.

Joshua got up from his chair and walked towards Saoirse. He sat down Indian style next to her, she looked up at him and watch his hand grab hers. She began to blush  
“It is now the time to stop running and face your problems head-on.” He said. 

She felt anger rise in her. “Face my problems? No, it’s about other people having to face them and dying for it! I’m leaving, and you’re not going to stop me.”  
Saoirse ripped her hand from his and began to stand and wobble to her feet. Her leg was sore, but she was able to limp on it. As she turned towards the dens exit Joshua was already standing in her way. He slowly walked toward her, picked her up and walked her over to the bed and laid her down. He then pinned her down by her shoulders and got inches from her face looking her square in the eyes.

“You’re not going anywhere.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you've made it this far you are probably confused. My OC in this fanfiction is a mash-up of fallout 3, NV, and 4. I call her my lone survivor courier. lol.  
> If anyone wants I can always post a brief summary of her backstory.


	3. Chapter 3

“Can I at least go take Daniel his map?” She asked.

Joshua removed his hands from her and sat at her bedside. He stared at her for a while. Saoirse started to feel uncomfortable. “I’ll go with you to help in case your leg gives out.” He finally said.

She hesitated for a moment “Okay…uhm. Thanks.” She said.

Joshua got up and walked to the other side of the room, he returned with some clothes Saoirse never seen before. “Your clothes were ripped so we found these for you.” Joshua presented her with the clothes and laid them on the bed. “If you need help getting dressed I can get Bright-Star-Shining.” He asked. 

“No…no, it’s fine, I can manage on my own.” She said slightly nodding. 

Joshua turned to leave “Once your dressed and have had something to eat we can head out.” He said in an even tone. He left, and Saoirse carefully raised herself to stand. She felt less groggy, but her leg was still searing. She looked over the clothes he gave her, there was a pair of female jeans which she didn’t mind, next there was a small flannel grey and white long sleeve shirt, the shirt looks a bit small.

Saoirse carefully removed the green dress and folded it on her bed. She grabbed the shirt and searched the pile of clothes quickly realizing there was no bra. _Ugh! Men! I don’t think any of the tribal woman would have any C cup bras laying around._ She sighed and put the flannel on. She buttoned up the shirt and noticed she had a slight midriff, but didn’t mind since she was thin anyway. Saoirse threw on the jeans and searched for her hat. I guess they forgot that too.

Running fingers through her hair and opened her bag and found a hair tie. She loosely braided her hair to the side and walked out of Angel cave. She saw Arcade sitting and reading a book. “Hey, you’re up! How is your leg?” Arcade asked. 

Saoirse carefully sat down on the log. “It’s okay, I feel more pain than I did this morning. Arcade got up quickly and rifled through his bag. He came back and handed her a stimpak. “Thank you” She smiled. Saoirse took the top off and slowly injected it near her wound on her leg. “Did anyone happen to see my sniper rifle?” She looked at Arcade. 

“No why? Did you lose it again?” He asked with an amused look on his face. “Yes.” She had a sad look on her face “I dropped it at the welcome booth when I got attacked by the yao guai. Arcade was still listening as he cut off a piece of big horner meat from the cooking station.

“I’m sure someone can go get it for you. I know how much you love that gun and how many times you’ve risked your life for it.” He rolled his eyes. “Here, Eat. You need to get your strength back.” 

“It was just a scratch.” She said taking the plate. 

“Yeah, a really deep scratch…like to the bone” he explained. Her leg started to ache at the words he said. 

As she finished eating the big horner meat she saw something metal catch her eye. She saw her sniper rifle floating in the air to the side of her. She looked up and saw Joshua’s hand attached to it. “I went back yesterday and got your gun.” He said. 

Saoirse got a huge smile on her face, “Thank you! Yay!”

“You should really have a weapon for close range as well. Especially with an encounter like yesterday.” She looked up and he was looking down at her.

“Yeah, I probably should...” She said. Arcade coughed, Joshua and Saoirse looked his way.

“Arcade, Hello, how are you doing this morning? I’m sorry for the way I acted yesterday.” Joshua said in a low tone.

Arcade nodded and gave a slight smile. 

“Wait, what happened?” Saoirse was concerned.

“Oh, nothing.” Arcade let out a small laugh and wave his hand “Just lifted me up by my shirt demanding information about you.” 

Saoirse gave a surprised look and turned to Joshua giving him an angry look. “That wasn’t very nice.” She said raising her voice.

“Let me know when you're ready to go.” He said as he turned and walked away from the campfire lounge. She turned back to Arcade.

“Where are you guys going?” he asked. “Dropping a map off to Daniel I guess” She paused. “At least you got an apology, I only get ignored.” She said with a soft smile. Arcade laughed, “Yeah I guess so.”

Saoirse got up from the log and grabbed her rifle, She turned and walked to where Joshua was talking to two Dead horse tribals. She waited patiently behind him for him to finish. One of the tribals glanced over her way and Joshua paused his conversation to see what the tribal was distracted by. Joshua turned back to the tribals “Let me know what you find, I’ll be going to the Narrows, but I will be back later in the day.” He said to them. The tribals nodded and both ran out to leave Angels landing.

Joshua turned towards Saoirse “Ready to go? Do you need me to carry you” he asked.

Saoirse laughed “No…no I am fully capable of walking.” She said crossing her arms.

“Then lets be on our way” He gestured his arm towards the entrance. 

Saoirse and Joshua had been on the road for about ten minutes. It had been completely silent up to this point. 

“You never told me your real name.” He asked still looking forward. The was a moment of silence. 

“Saoirse.” She said softly. He looked over at her then back ahead of them. 

“How old ar-“ He was interrupted. Saoirse stopped to look at him. She had a stern look on her face “I know you saved my life an all, but that doesn't get you more answers from me, the less you know the better.” She started walking again “Let’s just give Daniel the map and convince him to kill these assholes then I can leave and you and everyone else can move on with your lives.”

“Who is after you?” He said still standing where he was. 

Saoirse stopped shaking her head and smiling in amusement. She turned around to face him “You don’t give up do you.”

Joshua started walking towards her still staring at her with narrowed eyes. She started to feel uneasy with that look but didn't show it. Joshua just walked passed her, she felt relief and continued to follow. They arrived at the Narrows when the sun was in the middle of the sky.

She always loved how cool it was in the narrows, and thought the women’s tribal armor was pretty neat. Saoirse walked searching the area for a man with a hat and flannel.

“Six! It’s good to see you again! How are you feeling? I heard a yao guai got you in the leg.” Daniel approached us looking concerned.

“I’m good, and yeah, Joshua saved me though.” She said. Daniel looked at Joshua and gave a slight smile and nod. 

“She’s lucky you were there then!” Daniel said. There was a pause. 

“Oh….I have…your…let..me…find it….Map! Yes, here is your map.” Saoirse handed Daniel the map and smiled. 

“Great! Thank you so much! Here it’s not much but I want to pay you for doing that.” He said. 

“No thanks, I didn’t do it for the money. I’m glad I could have helped though.” She said.

A group of people had walked past Saoirse from behind to meet Daniel. There were two women and three men. Both women were wearing knee-length dresses and their hair did nice and looked uppity. The men were in t-shirts and jeans similar to Daniels clothing. 

“Welcome everyone! Six these are just a few of the many New Canaanites that have been here for a few months already, they just got back from missionary work. This is Mitchell, Glen, Shelly, and April.” Saoirse smiled and made a small wave.

She noticed the one called Shelly seemed to give her a smug look.

Shelly turned towards Joshua, "Hello, Joshua, how have you been? I see you have found a new "friend". She looked at Saoirse like she was an insect.

"I am well, Saoirse is here from the east to help with the white leg problem." He said.

Saoirse slowly turned towards Joshua with fire in her eyes. He didn't seem to care.

"Your name is Saoirse?" Daniel asked curiously.

Saoirse ignored his question and began to angrily march off further into the narrows. Joshua followed to catch up to her Saoirse stopped and turned around “Just leave me alone!” she hissed. Joshua stopped and narrowed his eyes at her.

He slowly walked to her “If you won't tell me then maybe your friend will like last time” He threatened.

“You leave arcade alone!” she tried to shove him, but he didn’t move. “FINE…Fine! What is it about me that you need to know! Do you get off on people telling you things?” She said. His composure didn’t change. 

One of the missionaries walked up to Saoirse "Hey, bud she wants to be left alone. Come one let's get out of here." She gladly followed and Joshua did not.

Saoirse walked with Glen until they found her favorite spot in the narrows. She liked to sit on a rock just above the stream and soak her feet. She sat down and took her boots off. She rested her head on the back of the cave wall and closed her eyes.  
_What is this guys deal…What does the Malpais Legate have to offer me. Even if he was the most feared man I don’t think he would be able to handle the enclave._

Glen had taken a seat next to her, he was shorter than most men and had brown hair and eyes. Most of the girls would consider him a handsome man.

"What does that guy want from someone as pretty as you anyway?" He asked.

Saoirse sighed "To help i guess. I don't know."

"Well, if he bothers you again let me know, but it will cost you a price." He winked placing his hand on her upper thigh.

Saoirse didn’t like where this was going and immediately stood up.

“I’m sorry Glen I’m not feeling very well, and I have to go find Daniel to talk to him.” She said walking away.

 _Wow, Didn't expect religious men to be such pigs_ She rolled her eyes. 

Walking through the water Saoirse spotted Daniel sitting around a campfire reading his bible. Saoirse approached him, she seemed nervous and thought of a million ways to go about this. She didn’t like to step on people's toes too much. 

“Hey, Daniel.” She said.  
Daniel turned his head with a surprised look that quickly turned to apologetic. “Six! I’m sorry about all of that."

“Don’t worry about it, It’s not your fault.” She reassured. “I wanted to talk to you about the white legs.”

Daniel gave her a curious look, and out of the corner of her eye, she could see Joshua lurking nearby. She knew he was ease dropping, Saoirse wanted to get this over with so she took a deep breath.

“I’m going to be blunt, We need to fight the white legs. I believe it’s mandatory to ensure everyone’s safety." She stated.

Daniel gave her an emotionless expression and looked to the ground. “Did Joshua put you up to this?”

“No, no, he did not Daniel. I made this decision on my own and from experience. Even if you guys managed to escape they will follow you and they will keep following you until all of your people are dead. I know this isn’t what you guys want and I wish there was a different way.” She paused. “Daniel…Back in my time it was easier to practice peace, but not in this world.” she gave him a sad look.

“All Joshua wants is an excuse to massacre people….. Saoirse…. Joshua, his intentions have always been in a dark place. I can see purity in you. Don’t let him take you down with him.” He said with an angry face.

She gave Daniel and soft smile and looked to the ground “It’s already too late for me Daniel.” 

She looked at Joshua and he returned her glace with a serious look on his face. She was sure he heard every word they were talking about. Saoirse turned and walked away from Daniel. She could feel her leg starting to ache and began to slightly limp her way towards the entrance to the Narrow. It always bugged Saoirse that she couldn’t make everyone happy, but she learned that making the right choice is better than popularity.

Saoirse was tired, emotionally and physically. As she walked out of the Narrows it was early evening, She checked her pip-boy, 5:37P.M. it read. She didn’t realize how long she had been there. 

There were splashing coming from behind her, “Do you need help with walking?” Joshua asked sincerely.

“No.” She said sternly. 

They walked for a while without exchanging any word. The sky had turned a bright orange color, She couldn’t feel the warmth of the sun anymore, but it shined bright on the tall rock walls. Saoirse admired the beautiful land for a moment, Breathing in the fresh air, She was beginning to like it here. All of a sudden Saoirse felt an arm wrap around her waist and one hand cup her mouth. Her eyes widened in horror. She soon found herself being thrown onto a bank and pressed into the dirt. She looked up to see Joshua hovering over her on his knees cupping her mouth. He wasn’t looking at her though, something had his attention over the bank.

“White legs.” He said in a low voice narrowing his eyes.

Saoirse could hear people in the distance, they were speaking in tribal. Soon she could feel the weight of Joshua's body lower on her. His groin had lightly grinded against the place between her legs. Saoirse furrowed her brows and could feel her face get red, Joshua looked down at her and looked at her for a moment. He lowered even more onto her crotch looking into her eyes, He had a hungry look in them. She started to feel his manhood grow through his jeans, and her body began to unwillingly ache for him. Instantly his attention moved to back to the white legs.

“Stay here, I’ll take care of these savages.” Joshua said before lunging over the bank. Saoirse laid there for a moment not moving an inch, She could hear firing in the distance and yelling. 

_Did he seriously just grope me? Maybe he did it on accident, but he was looking at me! UGHH, I shouldn’t be turned on by this! It isn’t normal! He’s old enough to be my dad. What the hell is wrong with me?_

Saoirse snapped out of her thoughts and crawled up to the top of the bank. She saw a camp and some old pre-war campers. She couldn’t see anyone and there was no more gunfire. There were multiple white leg bodies scattered across the camp, they all showed no sign of life.

“Are you coming?” she heard

Saoirse looked in the direction of the voice. Joshua was standing in the road cleaning the handle of his gun with a cloth. She got up off the ground and walked down the bank to where Joshua was standing. He pulled a pack of cigarettes from the back pocket of his jeans and lit one. He looked up a Saoirse and took a long drag.

“Out of all people I would never have imagined you to be a smoker.” She said lifting one eyebrow with a slight grin

Joshua blew out the smoke slowly and looked down at the embers on the tip of the cigarette “Fire didn’t scare me before I was burned, and it doesn’t scare me after” He said in a low voice “Come along, it’s getting dark.”

Saoirse and Joshua made it back to dead horse camp just as the sunset. 

“Hey guys!” said Follows-Chalk

Arcade glanced over to see who he was talking to. “Hey’ Girlie, How’s your leg? Come have a sit! Resting-Boot made some pretty amazing gecko stew.” Arcade said. 

Saoirse tried to walk at a more normal pace. “It’s good" She lied. "but I'm pretty tired.”

She wasn’t sure if she wanted to sleep next to Joshua or not, but a part of her was excited to. Saoirse said good-night to everyone and retired to the cave. The room was lit with a dim lantern and the air was cool and crisp. Joshua was near his workbench unbuttoning his shirt like he did every night. He always slept shirtless but kept the bandages on. Saoirse never seen him without bandages yet, she assumed he was ashamed of what he looked like underneath. She glanced away and started going for her bed at the other end of the room.

“Saoirse.” He said in a low voice. The way he said it gave her goosebumps.

She turned and paused, he was looking at her. “I’m…..uh.” He shut his eyes and shook his head. “Never mind”

“What? What were you going to say?” She asked walking towards him slowly.

He folded his shirt and placed it on a small table and took a deep breath. Joshua looked at the ground then back up to her. “I want to give you something. He said. He turned to go to his workbench and grabbed a gun. He walked over holding it out in both hands and looking down upon it like it was made of glass. He held the weapon out of Saoirse and she took it in her hands.

She examined the weapon for a moment noticing the snakeskin grip and odd letting on the barrel.

“And the light shineth in darkness and the darkness comprehended it not.” He said. “It’s Greek if you’re wondering, I want you to have it.”

She looked up to meet his gaze she didn’t notice how close he was to her, he had a strange look in his eyes. She started to feel a ticklish feeling in her chest, one she never felt before.

“Thank you” She smiled.

She could swear there was a slight smile underneath all those bandages. ‘More New Canaanites will be here tomorrow. We should get some sleep we have a battle to plan.” His face returned more serious now. Saoirse nodded.


	4. Chapter 4

Saoirse was sitting at the front of the boat enjoying her hair blowing in the wind. She loved going out on the boat. “Be careful up there hunny.” Her father said. Saoirse looked back smiling tightening her pink life jacket. She watched other boats and jet skis go by wondering how fun it would be to race across the water herself. 

“Ready?” Her father said holding out a fishing rod. 

Saoirse smiled and grabbed the giant pole that had a line already cast out to the water. “Thanks, daddy!” She smiled

James pole started to arch and the line began to yank. “Oh! You got one daddy!” She yelled excitedly.

He started to reel and pullback over and over until a giant fish came out of the water and landed on the boat. The fish started to flail all over the floor, Saoirse laughed hysterically while her father tried to grab it over and over. James finally got the fish into a giant lock box. He wiped sweat off his forehead and looked at his daughter and started laughing as well. Soon James smile faded and it was all black.

Saoirse awoke and sat up, she noticed tears coming down her face. Saoirse wiped them away and looked around the den. Joshua was gone, she assumed he is gathering his men and going over the battle plan.

Saoirse looked at her pack and saw clean clothes, she decided now would be a good time to go bathe. She grabbed the clothes and headed out of the cave. “About time you woke up.” Arcade approached her.

“huh? What time is it?” She asked.

“It is 11:49 am.” he said looking at his watch.

“Damn, I don’t usually sleep that long” She scratched her head.

“Did someone keep you busy last night?” Arcade grinned.

“Oh hah” She narrowed her eyes at him “I’m going to clean up a bit I’ll be right back.”

Saoirse walked to the back of the eastern virgin where there was a quiet bathing area. She took off the flannel and jeans Joshua gave her and laid them on the rock. She undid her hair so it flowed halfway down her back. Saoirse combed her fingers through her hair until most of the snarls were out. She slowly stepped in the water. It was still cool from the night, she walked until the water was to her armpits. She tilted her head back and soaked her hair, the water covered her ears and stared at the sun through the clouds. For a minute Saoirse forgot about the world. She heard splashing sounds from under the water, she lifted her head to see who it was, her hair was heavy lifting her head out of the water. 

Suddenly, she felt her head fall under the water like something was pulling on her hair. She began to flail her arms around trying to grab whatever is holding her down. She felt panic rise in her chest, she opened her eyes underwater to see a blurry figure standing above her.  
Saoirse chest started to hurt and she was becoming light-headed. Suddenly, she was lifted out of the water by her hair. She gasped for air and coughed up water. Her head was twisted up to look at her perpetrator. 

She saw big crazy eyes, and a smile covered in bright red lipstick. "You're going to stay away from him. He doesn't need some disgusting waste lander like you" Shelly then spat in Saoirse face.

Shelly pushed Soairse into the water and walked to the shore, She glanced back at her and grabbed Saoirse's clothes. "Sorry, clothes are not for animals."

Saoirse stood still in the water and watched Shelly walk off with her belongings. Saoirse felt hatred fill her veins, She darted out of the water and grabbed her old flannel and jeans and threw them on. She ran back to the camp and looked around like a predator looking for its prey.

There she was, standing next to Joshua, touching his forearm and smiling at him. Saoirse walked a steady pace towards Shelly with a determined look on her face. As Saoirse almost made it to her, Shelly glanced over and her expression went from happy to fear in an instant. Joshua noticed this and turned his head to see Saoirse arm reach out and grab Shelly by the neck. His eyes widened as Saoirse pushed her to the ground and climbed on top of her.

Soairse had a sadistic smile on her face "You messed with the wrong waste lander, Bitch," She began punching Shelly's face over and over. Shelly started to shriek and gurgle from the pain. Joshua just watched Soairse slam her fist into this woman with awe. Shelly had lost two teeth and her nose was crunched to the left side of her face.

Suddenly, Saoirse felt multiple arms grab her off Shelly. Two men picked her up off the ground and tried holding her back. Saoirse arms and legs were still flailing. Shelly's friend April and other New Canaanites rushed to her side

"What the hell is wrong with you!?" a person said toward Saoirse.

Soairse didn't answer and kept giving Shelly a heated look. Shelly didn't return the look since she was passed out. 

"Joshua, What is her problem? She is dangerous, she needs to leave." April said.

Joshua snapped out of his daze, he looked down at Shelly then to Soairse. He walked over to the two men and grabbed Saoirse by the arm and led her to Angel cave. When they got to his den he grabbed her by both upper arms. "What the hell happened?" His eyes were widened but not by anger. Saoirse was still breathing heavy and stared at Joshua without saying a word.

"You are not helping things by being quiet." He hissed squeezing his grip on her arms, hard enough there will be bruises.

"She tried to drown me!" She yelled. She released herself from his grip. "What the fuck is wrong with you Mormons!" Her eyes still wide. "Even after post-war your still fucked up people."

Joshuas eyes narrowed at her "What is that suppose to mean?"

Saoirse turned and face away from him and crossed her arms."Just forget I said anything." 

Joshua started to walk over to her when he was interrupted. "Joshua, Daniel wishes to speak to you immediately." He turned to Saoirse who had already left to the back entrance of Angel cave. 

Joshua left Angel cave, he found a lump of the New Canaanites had left to bring Shelly back to the Narrows. He saw Daniel speaking to another New Canaanite, Daniel saw Joshua and patted the other man on the shoulder and said his goodbyes. He started walking towards Joshua. "What happened? I was told the Soairse just attacked Shelly out of the blue! Did you get any answers from her?"

"All she said is that Shelly tried to drown her." Joshua said

Daniel furrowed his brows and squinted his eyes."What? That makes no sense. Why would she do that?...Is....Is Saoirse right in the head? I mean....Does she seem a litt-" He was cut off. 

"Saoirse is not sick." Joshua said in a low tone. 

Daniel Sighed, "I don't know. Ugh...Whatever their fighting over it needs to stop. We have more important matter to attend too." Daniel said. 

"Agreed" Joshua said.

Soairse walked to the cliffside and sat on the ledge. It was midday so she felt the max heat of the sun. _I don't even know what to think anymore. I try and help people, but I get treated like a whore and some muppet tries to drown me._ She leaned back and placed her palms behind her looking out at the view. She heard footstep from behind her and glance back quickly ready for anything.

"Relax outlander, It's only me." Bright-Star-Shining said. She walked over to the ledge and sat next to Soairse. "I do same thing if the prissy outlander attack me." She said raising her brows and nodding. "I throw her off cliff for you?"

That put a smile on Saoirse face and they both laughed. "Others" She pointed down to dead horse point. "They like you, you helping dead horses, and war chief has eyes for outlander" She points at Soairse. 

Saoirse eyes widened, "Probably not after what happened." 

"Prissy one likes Joshua, Daniel tries to join them." Bright-Star-Shining said. "Hah, but he goes to you when moon sets." 

Soairse blushed for a moment then felt a brief feeling of jealously wave over her. "Have they.....Are they together?" Saoirse couldn't believe she just asked that. "Oh, no he has no eyes for her, she jealous she sees he has eyes for you though." Bright-Star-Shining said."So I guess that's why the crazy bitch attacked me." Saoirse said. Bright-Star-Shining smile and nodded and Saoirse returned it. 

"Okay, What did you do now?" The girls looked back to see arcade approaching them, He sat next to Saoirse on the other side. 

"I go back to cave, Yellow-Matress got attacked by gecko and need help still." Bright-Star-Shining said."Thank you." Saoirse said looking up at her. Bright-Star-Shining smiles and leaves to go into cave. 

"I knew you maybe had something for Joshua, but you can't attack every woman who approaches him." Arcade said. "Arcade, I will throw you off this cliff." She said. He smiled "So what exactly happened? I heard she attacked you first or something.?" He asked. Saoirse told him every detail that had happened to her. "Oh my god, what is wrong with that psycho! Did you tell Joshua? He said. 

"I only told him that she tried to drown me and then a New Canaanite walked in and wanted his attention so I just left to avoid it." She paused and a look of realization came onto her face. "What if she works for the enclave?". 

"Saoirse, that's....possible. I don't even know what to say." He said in a low voice. 

"I need to leave Arcade, It's getting too dangerous for these people." She said sadly. "I need you to help me sneak out, cause you know who is keeping me here for some damn reason." She said. Arcade had a look of concern on his face. "Okay, we can do it tonight, But...you sleep next to him he'll know you left. He said. 

"But that's where you come in!" She paused and Arcade had a confused look on his face. "You can put on a nightgown and a wig and pretend to be me." 

"What!!" He raised his voice smiling. 

Saoirse and Arcade busted out laughing for a couple minutes."Hey, it could have worked." She said. "Yeah, I don't feel like getting drily humped by the Malpais Legate." Arcade laughed. "Okay, we have to keep it down" Saoirse was still giggling. 

"we're just better off waiting until this war is over, we're going to battle tomorrow evening anyway then I'll be on my way." She said in deep thought. "Are you going to the dead horse's celebration tonight? Everyone in Zion except the white legs will be there." He asked. "That doesn't sound like a good idea, The white legs might attack us, we should at least set up eyes." She said. "Okay, that's creepy, Joshua said that exact thing about the celebration too." Arcade gave an odd look. "Guess I can read minds." She said "I need to try and get some rest my lungs still hurt from that. I'll see you later." 

Saoirse knew she wouldn't get any sleep in so she decided to go in the den and lay on her bed and read. She found a book in a different language book just looked through at the pictures. When it hit nightfall she could hear the commotion of the celebration outside. She stayed where she was, she didn't feel like socializing. She heard footsteps and looked towards the opening and saw a figure standing there. It was Glen.


	5. Chapter 5

Triggers in this chapter. 

"What are you doing in here all by you're lonesome?" He said slowly walking into the den. 

Soairse sat up in her bed more slightly suspicious "I'm relaxing and enjoying peace and quiet. Why are you here?" She narrowed her eyes. 

Glen walked slowly to a workbench and started toying with a broken compass. "Have you thought about my offer?" She knew what he was talking about but wanted to play dumb in the hopes he would go away "What offer?". 

He looked up at her and placed the compass back on the workbench and slowly started to walk towards her. "You know, how I got Joshua off your back?" He got to her bed and sat down, Saoirse placed her book down and scooted away from him. "I don't need any help with him, He doesn't bother me, he was just trying to help me." Glen laughed "You can't be serious? What can that deformed piece of shit offer you?".

She started to get angry, "You need to leave." 

"Well, there's a problem with that, you owe me from yesterday." He said smiling and leaning in towards her. "Get the FUCK away from me!" Saoirse yelled as he lunged at her. Saoirse managed to kick him in the chin. He winched in pain as his head flew back, she pushed over him jumping off her bed and running towards the exit. She suddenly found herself planted on the ground. She felt hands grab her ankle and leg and began to climb up her back and held her arms to the ground. 

Saoirse began to scream only to make out a peep when Glen twisted and locked her arm around his and covered her mouth. "Shut the fuck up, I'm going to give you something to scream about." She felt one of glens arms remove from her left arm and tug at her jeans fiercely. _I am not going to lose my virginity to a fucking scumbag!_ Saoirse felt panic grow in her chest as she realized what was about to happen. She began to squirm to break free, she managed to get one arm above her head when she felt a horrible pain on her shoulder. Her screams were muffled by his hand and tears began to well in her eyes. 

He managed to twist and pull her jeans down to her ankles, she felt him start to pull and her underwear when she suddenly felt his weight lifted off of her. She saw the window of opportunity and scuffled away a few feet. Saoirse turned over and crawled as far back as she could. She saw the light shining behind an odd looking black figure. She heard an angry deep voice, "It is by the wicked that the wicked are punished." 

Her eyes came into focus to see Joshua holding Glen by the neck, Glen's eyes were almost bulging and his face was turning beet red, he was flailing his arms around, Joshua looked over at Saoirse for a moment then back to Glen, Joshua had a crazed look on his face. Within seconds she heard a snap, almost like a twig breaking. Glen's body dangled loosely from Joshua's grip. Joshua tossed Glen's body off to the side like it was some rag doll and he walked over to Saoirse. She noticed her jeans were ripped and down to her ankles, and her shoulder seared in so much pain. Tears still in her eyes she began to wince and hold the wound, _What the fuck did he do to me?_

"Let me see." He said. She removed her hand and he looked at her would for a few moments. "What did he do to me?" She asked in a shaky voice. "He bit you, and it looks deep. His gaze left the bite mark and to look into her eyes. "Are you alright?" He said. She noticed she was still crying and wiped her tears away, the last thing Saoirse wanted in this world was anyone to pity her or make her feel weak. "No, I'm fine, I Cou--Thank you." She looked over at the dead New Canaanite laying lifelessly across the room. "What are we going to do about him?" She paused with her eyes wide at Glen's body. "What will people think of you if they found out you killed one of their own?" She asked worriedly. 

"I will handle it." He said in a low voice. At that moment Joshua stood up and walked out of the cave. Saoirse was still in shock, she stood up and stared at glens body for a while. She then took the rest of her jeans off and searched the den for any bottoms she could wear. She found a pair of black shorts and threw them on. She then searched for gauze to place on her shoulder. 

Saoirse heard footsteps and began to panic, it was Joshua and two dead horses. They walked in and looked at Saoirse, then to the dead New Canaanite and back to Joshua. Joshua spoke in their tongue and the dead horses nodded and placed Glen's body in a sack and began to carry it like it was a giant bale of hay. Joshua stopped them before they got to the exit, they exchanged a few words and left.

Joshua then looked at Saoirse, her eyes were still wide. "What are the-" She was interrupted. Joshua walked to her "Let's get that wound taken care of." He said. He walked to some shelves behind his workbench and grabbed some gauze and a bottle of some liquid. "Sit." He said gesturing to his chair. Saoirse walked over and sat at the workbench, she unbuttoned her shirt a little and pulled in down just past her shoulders. She glanced down at the guns and magazines on the table. "This is going to sting." He said without sympathy. She knew what it was, and nodded and bit slightly down on her lip. 

She was still looking down and heard the liquid swish meaning it was being tipped into the gauze. A few moments later she felt a burning sting that made her back arch and bit down on her lip enough to draw some blood. He placed his hand on her unwounded shoulder to hold her in place. She winced in pain, but didn't make a sound, she then felt the sting lessen after a few moments. When she finally relaxed more he asked "Where did you get this scar?", he was still cleaning her wound. "A tunneler." She said in a low tired voice. She planted her palms on her forehead and leaned on them with her elbows on the table. 

She could feel him pause for a moment, "You've been to the divide.." He said. "Unfortunately." She said. After a few moments, he began working on her again. "Who is after you?" He asked in a soft voice that she never expected to come from him. 

She didn't want to give him a hard time or argue with him "The Enclave...They want me dead because I ruined their plans and killed their president." She paused. "And they will kill anyone who gets in their way." Joshua didn't say anything, he finished dressing her wound and lifted her shirt back on. She got goosebumps when his fingers ran up her shoulder. Saoirse buttoned up her shirt again, "Want to go for a walk? I'd like to show you something." He said. She was exhausted and still in pain, but for some reasons unknown to her she agreed. 

They walked out of Angel cave and walked in the shadows of the dead horse's pre-battle celebration. He leads her to a narrow path that had tall rock walls on each side, it seemed to go upward. He was ahead and reached his arm back, she hesitantly grabbed his hand and he led her through the winding rocky hall. They reached an opening at the top of a wide ledge. She was speechless, she never saw the stars eat up so much of the sky in Zion, they were usually blocked out by the giant rock structures before her. She saw mountains shadowed in the distance. The sky was different colors of dark and light blue, the stars lit up the top of the valley giving it an orange and burgundy ombre effect. 

"Seeing such beauty reminds me why this land is so sacred, and why we must protect it." He said. Saoirse broke her gaze to look at him but didn't say anything. "Do you believe in God, Saoirse?" He asked returning her gaze. She looked down and felt a tad uncomfortable.. "Uhm...well, no, not anymore." she said. "Then why do you have that cross around your neck?" He said. Saoirse looked down to see her mothers cross exposed, she took it in her palm. 

******************************************** 

Saoirse was sitting around a fire under a bridge in the ghetto on Dupont Circle, she heard murmurs and distant screams. The place smelled musty and like feces. " What the fuck are you looking at?" Charon said as he stood up from his seat across from Soairse. She turned to see who he was talking to, there were two thugs walking by giving her a shady look. They quickly turned and walked faster as Charon pulled his gun out. "You couldn't have picked a better place for us to stay for the night could you?" He said raising his eyebrows and sitting back down. 

"I thought it would be safe since it's populated," She said quietly. She hunched in her chair yanking a ratty blanket over her head to hide her self a bit more. "You still have a lot to learn kid, come on we're going to find another place to sleep." He said standing back up again and searching the area. They began to walk parallel to the broken bridge killing super mutants and ghouls along the way. They reached Georgetown and looked for a place, the neighborhood seemed to be quiet and unpopulated. "Here, this place looks good." He said quietly. "This place is nearly falling apart." She said. Charon spun around and covered her mouth. "You need to be quiet if you want to make it to your dad." He said narrowing his eyes at her. 

They walked up to the old houses porch and slowly opened the door. It was dark and the only light in there was coming from the moon shining through broken windows and a partially collapsed roof. Directly in front of them to the side was a staircase with no entrance due to damage. To the left, there was an old living room with a broken down red couch and television tipped on its side. Charon walked in and held his gun out searching each room, Saoirse still stood at the entrance imagining what it looked like before the war. "Close the door." He said walking out the of the last room lowering his gun. Saoirse broke from her though and closed the door. She walked into the living room searching for any loot she could find. 

She walked into the back corner of the room and noticed another smaller room, there was a putrid odor coming from this room. An odor she was starting to get familiar with in this new environment. It was completely dark in there. She fumbled to turn her pip-boy light on and aimed it inside the room. She gazed upon the room not completely registering what she was looking at. Everything shined a different color green, there was a woman sitting in the corner of the small pantry with her legs spread open. Her clothes were torn off and there was blood between her legs and a deep wound on her throat. Saoirse looked at her face, there was no face anymore, just a gaping hole of decayed flesh a rat was eating. 

On top of one of the woman's legs was a young boy lying face down with multiple stab wounds in his upper back. Saoirse began to feel sick and her breath began to quicken. She was backing up and covering her mouth choking on the smell. Charon walked towards Saoirse and glanced into the room. 

Saoirse turned and walked out of the house and leaned on the porch railing trying to contain her emotions. Saoirse backed up until she was at the wall of the house, she slid down to her knees and sat on her calves. As she felt tears coming down her face, she pulled her mothers necklace out of her shirt and looked at it. It had a thin silver chain and a simple cross no bigger than a quarter. 

Charon came out and sat down next to her, he reached in her pocket and handed her an inhaler of jet. Saoirse let go of the cross and grabbed the jet. She looked at the drug moving it around in her hand "Why would God let this happen?" She inhaled the contents and looked up at Charon with sad eyes. 

Charon was quiet for a moment and didn't look at her, "Gods dead kid, he died when the bombs dropped, and he isn't coming back." 

************************************


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to whoever has been following my story for this long. lol Are you all excited for the fallout 76 BETA?! I am! :D Also, this isn't close to the end of the story, I am honestly not sure how long it's gonna be but, it isn't over. :p

Saoirse broke from her thought, "It was my mothers.." She looked up to the stars."Sadly, I lost my faith a long time ago."

"I see." he said, "Maybe one day it will be restored." 

"Maybe, when pigs fly." She said smiling. Joshua gave her an odd look. 

"Thank you, Joshua." She looked at him "Your a good friend." Joshua looked at the ground for a moment before looking at Saoirse. He took both her hands in his and faced her, she began to blush. 

His icy blue eyes stared into hers "Saoirse." Her eyes became wide "I was hoping w-" "JOSHUA!" They both glanced over to see Follows-Chalk rushing up to them. "White legs...." He bent down and placed his palms on his knees and tried to catch his breath." They took out two of our dead horses at the west tower!" 

Joshua loosened his grip on Saoirse hands but pulled lightly on them urging her to follow before letting go. They all walked at a fast pace to dead horse camp, the celebration was quieter than it was before. Everyone was looking at Joshua as he walked up and looked down upon a wounded dead horse warrior, Saoirse was at Joshua's side. The warrior spoke in a soft voice, he had a deep gash in his side. Joshua urged him to be quiet and called a few of the dead horse women over to take him and tend to his wounds. 

"We need to attack tonight." Saoirse said. Everyone looked at her, including Joshua. 

"And why the hell would we do that?" a New Canaanite named Lewis said. 

"They were obviously testing our defenses since they won a battle at the west tower they will go back and report their success to their leader, they will plan their attack soon. I guarantee you that if we don't attack tonight they will by early morning. Obviously, they have eyes and they know we're having a celebration, what better time to attack when we are the most vulnerable." 

Joshua narrowed his eyes at her, she looked at him, but couldn't read his expression. He finally turned to one of the dead horse warriors and said something. The man immediately ran into the cave, "Ready your men, Lewis." He said standing up. 

Lewis's eyes got wide in disbelief "You have to be kidding me, You're taking advice from this gentile you met a few weeks ago!" Joshua furrowed his brows and walked towards him, Lewis's began to show slight fear on his life as Joshua got in his face. "Did I stutter?" Joshua said in a low voice. "No...no sir, I will tell the others" Lewis stumbled and ran out of dead horse camp. 

Joshua started walking back to Angel cave, Saoirse followed. "I'm sorry I called that, I just thought it would help. I know you're their war chief and all." She said. She looked over to see a group of dead horse warriors jogging by, carrying weapons. "You made a very valid point, I'd rather keep my people safe than be a close-minded simpleton." He mumbled turned away from her messing with things at his desk. "You're going to stay here." he said turning towards her. 

Saoirse narrowed her eyes "What? I'm supposed to be helping. Did you forget that part?" He looked at the wall and back to her again, "You just got a fresh wound this evening, you need rest." He said quietly and walked out of the cave at a quick pace. Saoirse still had a confused and irritated look on her face. After a few moments, she left the cave and went to sit on a log near the fire. She brought her hands to her chin and laid her elbows on her thighs, like a child who was just put in time out. 

Arcade sat down beside her, "Why the long face?" he said mimicking her body language. He then made an over exaggerated angry face. Saoirse started to crack a laugh, she then sat up straighter and started messing with the buttons on her pip-boy. 

"I was told to stay back."She said in a low voice. Arcade gave her am odd look "I think whoever gave you that advice was right, but since when do you listen to people?' he said. Saoirse was looking at her pip-boys map and glancing over Zions map. "You are right, Arcade. I don't." 

She gave a sly smile and stood up and strapped her rifle to her back. Arcade grabbed her hand softly, "Saoirse." She looked down upon her friend, he had sad eyes. "I know this is a bad time, but are you okay? I heard what happened to you, maybe this isn't the best idea." Her irritated and confused look returned. "Jesus, news around here spreads quicker than high school."

"I'll be fine, Arcade." She gave him a reassuring look, he still had the same sad eyes. "Well, I'm going with you then." He stated standing up tall. Saoirse let out a small laugh "Okay! The more the merrier." She said. Arcade pushed his glasses up with his pointer finger and grabbed stimpaks from his bag. "Okay, that's everything. Let's go kill some white legs." He said with a brave smile. 

The air was cool and crisp, it reminded Saoirse of fall and the water was freezing, she could feel her legs start to go numb. Saoirse and Arcade made their way through the winding canyon, she noticed the banks were littered with white leg bodies. 

"That odd, it's blocked off here." Arcade said looking at the tumbled rocks blocking a passageway to Three Marys. "Look, There's a cave entrance up there, they had to of gone through there." Saoirse said pointing up. They entered the cave and noticed more bodies, "This way." She said urging her friend to follow. 

"Watch it!" Arcade yelled before Saoirse was tackled by a female white leg, she had what seemed to be a mantis's leg strapped to her left arm. The white leg swooped her arm down and grazed Saoirse arm before the woman's expression began to change from anger to shock. Her body began to shake and then right before Saoirse's eyes she evaporated into a green goo. 

The slime sprayed all over Saoirse, she grunted and wiped the goo from her eyes and face. "Oh my god, gross!" She yelled in disgust. "Well, it was either that or be dead so." He said handing her a small rag, she took the cloth and wiped as much of the slime off of her. 

Saoirse got up "Did I get it most of it?" she asked her friend presenting herself to him. "Sure.." he said raising his eyebrows. She narrowed her eyes, "Okay, let's get moving." She said walking out of the cave. She walked down to the water looking around, she grabbed handfuls of water and began to wash. "Which way do you think they went" Arcade asked glancing at both directions. Both of them heard gunshots to the left of the valley, "This way." Saoirse said. 

Torches glistened against the rock walls, Saoirse could hear sobs up ahead. She pulled her gun up and turned on its light and aimed it at the sound. Freezing in her sights was a small tribal girl hunched over a male white legs body. The girl stared with wide eyes like a deer in headlights, she backed into a rock corner and grabbed a nearby club with wet and angry eyes. Saoirse felt sympathy for the poor child, her chest began to ache when a brief memory of the control room and Jefferson memorial popped into her head. Saoirse slowly walked by the girl and her dead father. 

They spotted a dim glow of warm light up ahead, there was also murmurs of people talking and yelling. "Up here, Arcade." As she approached the back of Three marys Saoirse noticed Sorrows, Dead horses, and New Canaanites slaughtering white legs, even the ones begging for their lives. Saoirse looked up ahead to see Joshua kicking a white leg to his knees. The man had a strange helmet on his head with what seemed to be a deer's bottom jaw attached to it. 

As Saoirse approached, Joshua glanced over at her, his eyes were cold and hard. He turned and shot two of the tribals kneeled before him, and looked back at Saoirse. "You're not supposed to be here." He hissed and narrowed his eyes at her. She walked closer to him, "It's done Joshua, look around you, you already won." She said in a pleading voice. Saoirse was no longer looking at Joshua Graham, but the Malpais Legate. "This isn't the man I know, you're better than this." She said. 

Joshuas eyes widened, "This animal gave no mercy to my family, and I will give none to his!" He scolded. " If what you believe is true, he'll pay for it later. Everyone shouldn't have to see you do this." 

"No! He and his tribe have worked hard for their wages. Who am I to deny them?" Joshua Seethed. "I want to have my revenge. Against him. Against Caesar, but I can't!" 

"I know, and I'm sorry! I wanted to tell you, if I knew you then, I wouldn't have taken that away from you, but this man isn't Caesar. 

"This is no man, this is an animal and the only use for an animal in our temple is sacrifice!" He said in a low voice as he aimed the gun at the white legs head. 

"Stop! Please don't do this." She begged. "When you took me to that ledge to show me the stars you said that one day maybe I will have my faith again, but not when I see things like this." She walked closer to him and tears began to well in her eyes. Joshua paused for a moment and looked back at the trembling white leg before him. 

Joshua slowly lowered his gun, "Leave, go back to your great salt lake." He said in a low voice. He looked back at Saoirse with recognizable and pained eyes. Salt-upon wounds scurried out of the valley as fast as he could, fumbling a few times in the water. Joshua walked past Soairse and didn't say a word, she watched him walk away without looking back. 

Arcade laid his hand on her shoulder. "OWWW!!" She winced. 

Arcade put his hands up, "What! what did I do!" He yelled. She was holding her wounded shoulder "It's nothing, I just got my shoulder messed up." She mumbled. She looked back at the entrance, she couldn't see Joshua anymore. "Hey, I think you did the right thing, he can't stay angry forever." Arcade said. They began to walk back to dead horse camp watching the sunrise. "You think he's angry?" She asked worriedly. "I don't know, whatever it is I'm sure he'll get over it." He said. 

"It doesn't matter, I'll be leaving soon anyway.." She said coldly.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Might be a day or two before chapter 8. I have a 5 pg rhetorical analysis essay due this week. >_<

Saoirse and Arcade made it back to dead horse camp around nine am, the camp was flooded with the wounded and surviving warriors. Saoirse could only count a handful that was dead, it looked like they were getting prepped for a proper burial. "We should probably offer help" Arcade suggested, Saoirse nodded. Saoirse saw a female sorrow laying on the ground, she kneeled down and tilted the womans head up to give her water. Saoirse smiled at the woman and she returned it, as Saoirse stood up she saw Daniel approach her. 

"It's good to see most of you all in one piece." He said with no expression, he looked down for a moment. "I want to thank you, for talking Joshua into sparing their leader. I just wish this all could of went peacefully." He said in a sad tone. Saoirse gave a slight smile and nodded. She was exhausted, all she wanted to do was sleep, sleep next to Joshua and forget about the world. _I'm going to miss that when I leave._

"If there is anything else you need just let me know, I want to be as helpful as I can before I go." she said, "Oh, you're leaving?" He asked surprised. "Yeah, I usually don't stay in one place for too long." She said 

"Good riddance." a voice came from behind her, Saoirse looked and saw a blonde woman in a blue dress. She had angry big brown eyes and a nose splint on, Saoirse realized who it was. "Shelly!" Saoirse smiled and narrowed her eyes turning around to face her and taking one step towards her, Shelly started to back up with a nervous expression on her face. Arcade appeared immediately in front of Saoirse, "Heyyyy Saoirse, why don't we go in the cave." He said with a tense friendly voice. 

Shellys confidence came back when she saw someone blocking her from being attacked, a lot of people were also eyeing the two women. "Yes, please keep your dog on a leash." Shelly said in a prissy voice to Arcade. Arcade gave Shelly an irritated look and put his hand softly on Saoirse back gesturing her to come to the cave. Saoirse was staring at Shelly with wide intimidating eyes. "Yeah, you wouldn't want this dog to knock out any more of your teeth." Saoirse said with a sly grin. Suddenly Saoirse jumped at Shelly making little bark sounds, the blonde jumped back a couple feet and screamed. Saoirse stilling smiling followed her friend into the cave. 

She caught up with Arcade "What am I going to do with you, Saoirse Ross." He said lightly laughing. "Well, for one, let me go to bed, with that display back there I'm sure you and I can both agree I need to." She said. "Definitely! Well, then I will bid you ado." He said looking over at Follows-Chalk. She smiled, she was happy her friend found someone "I'll see you a little later then." She said walking up the hill in the cave to Joshua's den. 

She was nervous, she felt her chest start to flutter and ache. _What the hell is wrong with me, okay, calm down._ She took a deep breath and finished walking into the room. It felt a little warmer than it did outside, Saoirse didn't look around the room for Joshua. She walked over to her bed and sat down still looking at the ground. She began to untie and remove her boots, she felt so much relief when they thudded onto the ground and she could move her toes. 

"Saoirse" She heard his voice from across the room, it was soft and hesitant. Just the sound of his voice made the hairs stand up on the back of her neck. She was dreading this moment for some unknown reason, she lifted her head, but didn't look in the direction of the voice. The sound she heard next was a chair being pushed against the ground then footsteps coming in her direction. Her heart began to race, but she still couldn't look at him. Not because she was ashamed of him, or that he ignored her. She was scared of her emotions that were growing for him, she didn't know how to respond to them. 

"We should change your dressings." he said as he sat beside her. Saoirse nodded and turned her body facing away from him, she moved her hair to the side and began to unbutton her shirt. She realized there was green slime still on her shirt and was disgusted to be wearing some dead persons ooze. "Wait." She stopped unbuttoning and finally turned towards him. 

Saoirse forgot what she was about to say as soon as she gazed upon him. He wasn't wearing his bandages, and he looked down to the ground in shame when she looked at him. Her facial expression did not reveal shock or disgust, just curiosity. He still had most of his eyebrows, it looked as if one side got the brunt of the fire. His right side of his face from his jaw up around his cheek to his hairline was mottled and lumpy with scars. He still had some short black hair on his head, a white and red complexion that faded onto the left side of his face. 

Saoirse never thought she would actually still find him attractive after seeing him underneath his wrappings, she noted he did have a hard look to him but assumed he was like that before being set on fire. 

"I'm sorry you have to see me like this." He said in a low voice. 

Saoirse felt pity for the man, she placed her hand lightly on his cheek and leaned in "You have nothing to be ashamed of Joshua." 

He slowly lifted his head starting directly in her eyes just inches away. He glanced down at her lip and back up to her eyes. She started to feel the flutters in her chest and a warmth between her legs. 

Saoirse immediately recoiled knowing what was about to happen. " I was just going to say I need to get clean." She said quickly. "I have all this crap all over me and it would make sense to do that before I changed my gauze." 

Joshua sat up, with a more serious look on his face. She could now easily read his facial expressions this way, she always liked reading people. She stood up and searched for clean clothes. Saoirse bunched up a pile in her hand and turned to Joshua with a nervous composure. 

"This may be weird, and you don't have to, but could you come with me? I just....like to relax when I'm in the water, but I can't lately with a crazed Mormon lady trying to kill me." She said. Joshua smiled, the kind of smiled that turned up more on one side than the other, Saoirse admired it for a moment, she liked seeing him smile. 

He stood up, "Of course, I actually have my own area I bathe in that's not in the sun. If that works for you?" Saoirse was surprised he even agreed, she now realized that he has the possibility of seeing her nude. "Yeah..yeah that's great...fine I mean." She said closing her eyes trying to collect herself. Joshua grabbed some towels and his own clothes. They walked out of the den like they normally would and after a few feet, he moved a giant flat plant out of the way to reveal an entrance way. 

They walked through the narrow cave walls and came upon a pool of water, it wasn't very big maybe the size of a car. The ceiling was covered in cave fungi that illuminated the water to a dark teal color. "This is beautiful." Saoirse said gazing around. Saoirse turned when she heard Joshua unbuckle his belt, she began to blush. She turned and placed her new clothes on a rock. She began to unbutton her shirt, she took a deep breath and slowly took it off revealing her bra. She heard water movement and turned. 

He was looking at her from in the pool, "You know you don't have to do this if you don't feel comfortable." 

She began to unbutton her black shorts, "It's not that I'm uncomfortable, it's just no guy has seen me nude before, well, besides my dad." She paused and widened her eyes "Not in that sense!" She blurted out. He smiled again and narrowed his eyes at her in curiosity. "So, you have not laid down with a man yet?" He questioned. 

She swallowed, "Uh no, I haven't.." She said overly nervous. Saoirse finished taking her shorts off. "I'm just going in like this." She said. Joshua nodded. 

Soairse got into the lukewarm water and got her hair wet, brushing out any snarls in it. After awhile Joshua spoke, "I'm sorry you had to see me like that today, you didn't deserve that." She looked at him and could see a sad expression on his face. 

"It's fine." She said looking down into the water, "I'm sorry for doing that, I just didn't want you to do something you regretted." She paused," I know I'm younger than you technically, but back in the east the only thing that kept me going was my anger and need for revenge, and when I finally got it, I felt even more empty than before." She looked at him, "And what's worse is I killed the wrong person." She said in a soft sad voice. Joshua didn't say anything. 

Saoirse got out of the water and began to dry off, she glanced over and saw Joshua across the room in the water laying his head back on a rock with his eyes closed. She took this opportunity to get dressed quickly. She turned away from him and took off her soaked undergarments, she dried off her breast and glanced over quickly to see if he was peaking. 

Joshua wasn't there. 

She began to feel panic rise in her chest when she looked down and saw him with his arms crossed resting them on the edge of the pool with his eyes locked on Saoirse like magnets, there was a wanting and lustful look to them. 

She covered herself in the towel and grabbed the rest of her clothes and walked quickly out of the room. She rolled her eyes, _Who is this guy, Jekyll and Hyde?_

She got back to the den and quickly threw her clothes on. She pulled on a bra and grey shorts, she began to feel the effect of no sleep for 24 hours. She sat on the bed waiting. After a few moments, he came into the den, "We'll have to clean your injury again.", Saoirse winced knowing it was going to sting, she moved her bra strap to the side. Joshua got the worst over and taped up her shoulder, she then threw on an oversized grey t-shirt. 

Soairse laid down on the bed, she felt his arm wrap around her. She was facing the wall with eyes wide, she was dreading tomorrow.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay, chapter 9 might be a few days too,college has me busy. hopefully by Sunday. I tried out the fallout 76 beta as well! I am already addicted. lol

Saoirse opened her eyes no longer feeling the warmth of him on her back, she sat up and looked over to see him at his workbench tinkering with the firearms from yesterdays battle. She jumped up from her bed and began to gather things.

"What are you doing?" He asked furrowing his brows. 

"I'm packing, Joshua. I helped you guys keep zion and now it's time for me to leave." She said coldly without looking at him. 

He got up from his chair and she could hear him walk toward her, she began to get nervous. "Even after everything..you're leaving." He said in low voice. "What do you mean after everything?" She said turning and looking up at him. He was a foot away from her with a pained look in his eyes. Saoirse realized this was going to be harder than she thought. 

Saoirse showed no emotion on her face, or at least she tried, she was fairly good at hiding her expressions. She turned and lifted the bag on her shoulder and began walking away. As she expected, he moved in front of her. "Why can't you stay? You have people who care about you here." He said. She raised her eyebrows "You're kidding right?" She gave an amused look. "Joshua, It's safer for everyone if I leave. You know this." 

"We can fight them, you just need to trust me. Just as we fought and won our battle against those savages." He said slightly hopeful. Saoirse was looking down fiddling with the end strap of her bag "Why..why do you want me to stay?" She looked at him with confusion. "I want to help you with this issue." He said in an even tone. "I don't need or want your help." She said a little more serious. 

Joshua then placed his hand on her upper arms. "I want you to stay, Saoirse." She knew where this was going, and it made her uncomfortable. Saoirse looked away. "You can settle down here...with all of us, with me." She glanced back at him and felt her face turn red, she noticed his eyes were soft and sincere, the last thing she wanted to do was hurt him. 

Saoirse turned away again "I...can't. I need to go, please don't make this harder than it has to be." 

Joshuas grip tightened slightly on her arms and pulled her closer. "Why don't you look at me. I want you to look at me and tell me you don't feel the same, that there is no chance." Saoirse didn't say anything and wouldn't return his stare. She tried to pull away from him but he wouldn't loosen his grip. She looked at him and gave him an angry glare. "Let go of me." She growled. 

After a moment he let go of her arm, but quickly grabbed her pack from her. "HEY! That's mine!" She yelled holding her arms in the air attempting to grab it. Unfortunately, he was much taller than her. She backed up a bit and attempted to push him, Joshua wouldn't budge. He just narrowed his eyes at her. 

Saoirse still angry, "You don't want me, I mean, what the fuck are you going to gain from me. I'm hunted by the remnants of the United States Government and if you couldn't tell I'm a little off the deep end. There are plenty of women here, I see how some of them look at you I'm sure there's one that would make you much more happy than I can." She pleaded. 

Joshua just started at her, she knew she wasn't lying, some of the women were fond of him, maybe it was cause he is a legend, or because he's was mysterious. Saoirse knew why someone would want him. She didn't see how anyone would want her though. 

"You're not leaving until you can look at me and answer my question." He said in a low voice turning to walk out of the cave.

Saoirse growled and stomped her feet like a child _This is ridiculous! Who the hell does he think he is!_ She grunted and walked out of the cave and sat on a log near the fire. She could see Joshua out of the corner of her eye. She was warming her hands by the fire and eavesdropping. "I want you and a few of your best men to meet me at dusk, Lewis. I have a mission for you all." He said. "Yes, sir." Lewis said before walking away. 

"Hey! Feeling better??" Arcade asked surprising Saoirse. "Oh hey. Yeah..yeah I'm good." After a moment she leaned in closer to him. "I'm being held captive!" She whispered loudly. Arcade looked down at her and furrowed his brows with an amused smirk. "What?" Saoirse rolled her eyes and sighed. "Joshua won't let me leave still. At least not till I tell him I have no feelings for him. " She said planting her chin in her palms and rolling her eyes. 

Arcade smirked "Well, you said you guys are just friends right? Why don't you just tell him then?" He said. "I don't know, I just can't, I had no problem in the past tell people how I feel. I just care about him enough not to want to hurt him." She said looking down. "Or your just denying how you really feel for him." He said quietly. 

She lifted her head and looked at him. "NO! That's not it." She said loudly. Everyone glanced over and her eyes widened. "I don't know. she said with doubt" She said looking over at Joshua, at the moment he returned her glance and not a moment later she looked away. 

Saoirse got up from her log and looked down at Arcade. "Well, I'm going to see if anyone needs help with building anything." She said. Arcade laughed "You'd find some way to destroy it. 

" Oh Haha." she said walking towards the end of the camp. She approached a woman who was unpacking soil from bags. She had brown hair that had slight grey to it. She looks to be in her mid 50's. The woman looked up at Soairse. 

"Hello there! How can I help ya kid?" The woman takes one of her gloves off and raises it to Saoirse. "Oh, sorry! Names Bernice!" She said. Saoirse took her hand and shook it slowly. "It's nice to meet you. I'm Saoirse." Saoirse said. Bernice raised her brows slightly and smiled. "That's a name you don't hear every day. It's pretty!" She said. "Thank you! I was named after my grandmother." Saoirse said letting go of Bernice's hand. 

"So Bernice did you need help with anything?" Saoirse said. "Why yes, if you don't mind were laying out a soil foundation for crops since ya know, it's all sandy here." She said looking down at the ground with a small giggle. "If you wanna help us do that and plant some corn and tatos I'd be so thankful! Just a warnin' it's dirty work!" Bernice said. Saoirse smiled "I don't mind!" 

Soairse worked for a few hours lifting bags of soil and planting new crops all while having small talk with Bernice. Saoirse and Bernice sat down at a makeshift table, Bernice handed Saoirse a Nuka-Cola. "Thank you." Saoirse said wiping the sweat off her head but smearing dirt on as well. They sat at the table for a moment, watching the stream go by. "So...How long have you been with the New Canaanites?" Saoirse said before taking a sip of her soda. 

"Oh my whole life." The woman took out a cigarette out and offered Soairse one, she gladly accepted. "I am so blessed I was born into such an amazing community. Everyone looks after one another, and we love all people no matter what they have done." Bernice said after taking a drag. 

Saoirse hesitated for a moment "Did you know Joshua?" Saoirse asked in a low voice. Bernice expression didn't change and was still smiling "Yes! He was about my age when we were growing up, He was such a nice person. He really did enjoy his missionary work too. When he came home we were all so happy" She said. Saoirse smiled and nodded. 

Saoirse loved the energy Bernice had, She was the type of person who could make anyone smile. Saoirse was starting to have more faith in New Canaanites after all. Saoirse then realized that Joshua was perhaps in his 40's, and for some odd reason that attracted her more. She always had a thing for older men even in high school, she remembers gawking at a few of her teacher and her friends teasing her about it. 

Soairse and Bernice watched the sky turn a bright orange-red "Wow today went by fast." Saoirse said putting out her smoke and standing up. "Yes, it did! Thank you so much for the help!" Bernice said cupping Saoirse hand in both of hers. "It was no problem. If you need more let me know." Saoirse said smiling.

Soairse was walking back towards the camp in front of Angel cave, she stopped to rinse her face and arm off in the stream. She looked over and saw about a dozen people around a campfire. She didn't feel like socializing so she headed into the cave up to Joshua's den. Every time she walked in there she always felt anxious and was glad to see he wasn't there. 

She undressed and put on a tank top and shorts and laid in bed staring at the wall until sleep took her. 

Soairse was woken up by sun rays coming in from the window and the sound of birds chirping. She sat up and yawned with a sleepy look on her face. She glanced around to see a clean pre-war bedroom, the walls were a cream with wood trim, and the floors were cherry hardwood. She looked over to the window on her right and saw a window with a sun bench under it. 

She got out of bed and took and few steps to glance outside. She saw vivid bright colors of the flowers and grass, no rusty or ruined neighboring houses. She looked back to the bed to notice it was a queen size and the blankets on the opposite side were disturbed. Saoirse walked out of the bedroom and into a long hall, she could hear the commotion at the end of it. 

All of a sudden, a small girl popped out of one of the rooms startling Soairse, "Mommy, It's time for breakfast!" the girl said. The girl had shoulder length black hair and a pink boy on the side with a light green dress on. She ran down the hall into another bigger room at the end. Saoirse folded her arms and could only display a confused look on her face. 

She walked down the hall, and into a kitchen. There was an older boy who looked to be 8 sitting at one end of the table with a red striped shirt and auburn hair, opposite to him was the little girl who startled Saoirse who was staring at her a smiling. In the middle Saoirse saw an expanded newspaper, suddenly it folded in half and there was a man. 

The man looked to be in his later 40's with dapper styled black hair and blue eyes, Saoirse knew those eyes to well. "Okay, kids why don't you guys go play outside!" The man said looking up at her and smiling, she knew that voice as well. The kid's got excited and ran to the door and put their shoes on. "Oh, watch out for the death claws and raiders!" The man yelled out smiling and waving to the kids. "Okie Dokie, pop!" The boy said. 

Opening the door Saoirse could hear gunfire and screams, she tried to move her arms and yell for the children not to go, but she just stood there with an involuntary smile on her face with her arms crossed as the door shut. The tall blue eyed man then stood beside her looking at the door, she looked over and saw he had legion armor on. He looked down at her with no expression. 

She then felt a sharp pain in her abdomen, Saoirse looked down to see a knife plunged into her. She started to tremble and make barely audible whimpers. Saoirse looked back up to see Joshua, with his bandages on, staring at her. "Why don't you look at me?" He said twisting the knife, her eyes widened and knees became weak. "I want you to look at me and tell me you don't feel the same, that there is no chance." He said angrily. 

Her vision started to fade and the last thing she saw were those piercing blue eyes.


	9. Chapter 9

Saoirse opened her eyes to see a familiar rock wall, she sat up and wondered if Joshua even came to bed last night since she didn't see him. She sat at her bedside remembering her dream last night for a moment. She rubbed her eyes and heard footsteps walk into the room, "Good morning sunshine." Arcade said handing Soairse some water. "Morning." She said in a rough tired voice taking a sip. 

She looked up at arcade "Have you seen Joshua at all?" She asked in a quiet voice. Arcade looked up like he was trying to remember something. "No, I haven't. Why?" He asked. Saoirse looked at the ground "Just wondering, I didn't see him last night or this morning, so." She said. "Awe, did you miss him last night?" Arcade said with an amused smile. Saoirse just glared at him. "Anyway, did you wanna help me and Chalk with a little dilemma?" He asked. 

She ran her fingers through her hair, "I guess, I was supposed to help someone today." She said. "Oh, it won't take much time, it's kinda important actually. It's a baby big horner, I guess one of them got lost and if we don't reunite them it could turn sour for the tribe." he said fiddling with his sleeve. "Yeah, I can help. Do you have any idea where it would be?" She asked slipping her boots on.

"Yeah we think it's kinda nearby in a canyon." Arcade said. Saoirse got up and darted for the entrance. She looked back "Well, come on! Let's go get the giant baby goat." She said. "Baby what?" He asked with a puzzled look on his face chasing after her. 

***********************************************

"Try to give it some banana yucca they love that stuff!" Chalk said. 

"Can I pet it?" Saoirse asked just a foot away from the beast looking at chalk. "Yeah! The babies won't do anything." He said. Saoirse started to pet the baby big horner. "Come on, Arcade! It's so furry!" She yelled. Arcade kept his distance, "Oh I'm sure it is, But yeah, I'm gonna pass." He said. Saoirse started feeding the beast and it began to follow her. She began to walk over a rock bridge and realized it wasn't following them anymore. "Try to give it more." Chalk said. 

She fed the animal more banana yucca and it began to follow her again. "Is that the mom she said walking backward gesturing to behind her to the big horner at the end of the bridge. Chalk looked back and shrugged. Saoirse rolled her eyes and smiled, "Like that helps us, I guess all that matters is getting it back to the herd." She said. Saoirse called the animal and was still waving the banana yucca in front of it leading it back to a pack of other big horners, the other big horners started to huff and stomp their feet. 

"Okay, that should do it." Chalk wiped the sweat off his head."Let's get out of here before they get even more riled up." He said. They started walking down the ramp from the dead horses hunting area. "Thanks for helping Saoirse." Arcade said "Yes, Thanks you, or.. thank you" He laughed. She looked back "No problem! It was actually fun to pet one of those things." She said. 

Saoirse was already exhausted, but it was still early so she decided to go put her rifle away and go help Bernice. As she was walking up the rock hall to the den she saw Shelly walking opposite. When shelly spotted her she smiled and started to button up the top of her dress that was slightly exposing her bra. Saoirse gave her a dirty look and was curious about why she was coming from Joshua's den. As she walked in she spotted Joshua standing near her bed buttoning his jeans with his shirt off, It took her a moment to understand what was going on. 

Saoirse was standing in the doorway, she began to feel betrayal and jealously build aggressively. "Are you serious? After what you were fucking babbling on about yesterday you do this?" She hissed. Joshua looked at her with a confused expression "Wha-" He said before he was interrupted. "No, I don't wanna hear another fucking word come out of your mouth ever again." She said pointing at him. He began to get an irritated expression on his face and began to talk. 

"Fuck off, Joshua." She said turning and leaving the cave. She walked at a very brisk pace feeling anger course through her. When she left she saw Shelly standing at the campground. Without thinking, Saoirse aimed her sniper rifle at her. 

"SAOIRSE, NO." Arcade yelled jolting and grabbing her rifle pushing it so it aimed at the ground. After the commotion, everyone turned to look to see what was happening. She glared at Arcade and he began to calm his demeanor hoping it would calm her. 

"What's the matter? I thought dogs like sloppy seconds." Shelly said smiling keeping her distance. 

Arcade still holding Saoirse gun snapped his head at her "Shelly...if you value your life, which I'm sure you do, you need to shut the fuck up." He said with a sarcastic smile. 

Saoirse threw gun her gun to the ground with Arcade following it and started towards Shelly. Shelly screamed and started hiding behind dead horse tribals. The tribals didn't like this and pushed her away from them, they had a sense of what was going on and started laughing at the pleading woman. Saoirse stopped and glared at her while Shelly backed against the rock wall. 

"I'm done with this shit." She said in a low voice. Saoirse turned and walked out of dead horse camp grabbing her rifle along the way. 

************************************************* 

After awhile Saoirse found a good place to sit and took a breather. She rested her head against a rock wall and turned her head to the side looking at something. "See, look where helping people got you. Gotta give you credit though, you made it through some tough shit." She looked down at the ground and let out a laugh. "Pretty sad I can relate more to a skeleton than anyone else in this sad world." She said taking a swig of whiskey from a shot glass. 

"Who are you talking to?" She looked over to see Arcade and chalk standing a few feet away from her. "Oh, sorry....This is Randall Clarke." She looked at the skeleton "Randall, this is my friend Arcade and his mistress." She said 

"Really? Have you been drinking again?" Arcade asked suspiciously "NO!" she said flailing her arms to the side of her as a whiskey bottle rolls out and slowly rolls away with all of them watching it. Saoirse let out a laugh and Arcade rolled his eyes and sat down next to her, he then looked at chalk "You don't have to stay here, she's a pain in the ass when shes like this." He said. "It's fine, I'll stay. Saoirse is your friend, so she is my friend." He said smiling. "Oh, what is a mistress?" He added 

Arcade laughed "Just means you're my...lover." 

"Oh okay!" Chalk said sitting down next to Arcade. 

"How the hell did you manage to find him?" Arcade asked looking at a skeleton. "I just found him, and he looked lonely so I sat down and we had a few drinks." She said with narrowed eyes and smiling, Arcade glanced down to see two shot glasses one empty and one full. 

Arcade looked forward and shook his head with a slight smile "People were worried about you."He said looking back at her. Saoirse started laughing "Yeah, okay." 

"Joshua wanted to come with me to find you, but I told him it wouldn't be the best idea." Arcade said. "You're right!" She looked at him "That wouldn't have been a good idea." 

"Saoirse, He didn't sleep with her. It just looked that way cause that bitch is conniving." Arcade explained. 

"How the hell would you know that is what I was mad at?" She laughed "I don't care about who he sleeps with." She said bringing her knees to her chest and folding her arms around them. 

"We put two and two together, what you said to him, the fact that she tried to seduce him in there, and you entering a few seconds after she leaves."

"It's pretty obvious now that you have feelings for the guy." Arcade said. She became more alert and looked at him "What? Was this some stupid test he was playing on me?" She said slurring her words. 

"Noooo, just your actions." He brought his fingers up to his temples and shut his eyes for a moment and sighed. "You thinking that he did do that, it made you mad right? So, that shows that you care, and the fact you don't want him with anyone else." He said. 

"Shit." She said under her breath. 

"It's nothing to be ashamed of, you should have just told him, Saoir-" He was interrupted. "No, I wasn't hiding anything, I guess I just never realized it myself.." She said in a low voice rubbing her eye with her palm. 

"What is wrong with her anyway? How is such a religious woman so mean?" She said trying to change the subject. Arcade shrugged, "I don't know, but Joshua made it clear she wasn't welcome at the camp anymore. Maybe a gecko will eat her." He said. Saoirse looked at him and smiled, but didn't say anything, she then looked over to her other side and looked at the skeleton.

"We should bury him." She said. Arcade and Chalk looked at the skeleton. 

"And where do you plan on doing that?" He said getting up and looking around. 

Arcade turned to see a skull in front of his face and gasped. "Bury me, Arcade!" Saoirse said out of the corner of her mouth moving the jaw of the skull along. He narrowed his eyes at her. "You need help! You just said we should give him a proper burial and now your playing with his skull." He said trying not to laugh. Saoirse made the skull look at her then back to Arcade. "Yeah, We are waiting for you to sober up before we go back." He said quickly grabbing a shovel and handing it to Saoirse. 

*************************************************** 

"All done!" Chalk said patting dirt on the ground. "There your man got a proper burial, now let's head back." Arcade said. Saoirse caught up with him "Thank you, for that, for everything actually." He looked at her as she spoke. "I honestly don't know where I would be without you. and you too Chalk! She said smiling and looking back, he smiled back. 

The sun was still in shining but it was in the lower west sky. Saoirse heard an odd faint vibration in her ears. It took her moments to register what it was. She quickly grabbed Arcades arm and had wide eyes. He gave her a concerned look after listening to the sound. "We need to go." She said. Arcade nodded. Saoirse was running in front of everyone else, as she was maneuvering through the winding narrow canyon she looked back "I will go tell Joshua, you guys stay here." She turned back ahead and dodged the bear traps. 

They made it back to dead horse camp and Chalk and Arcade went up to other warriors and started talking in their language, she didn't see Joshua so she continued running into Angel Cave. _Please be in here._ She could feel the anxiety rise in her chest, as she entered his den she stopped at the entrance and was breathing heavy. She saw him at one of his shelves, he was now looking at her with wide eyes. 

She started walking towards him, he turned his body to face her. She reached her arms up towards him and grabbed the back of his neck and placed her lips on his. She could feel his arms wrap around her and pull her closer, she wanted to stay in this moment forever. The fear, sadness, and confusion she had in her life disappeared around her when she was in his arms. 

She began to pull away, but he pulled her in more and kissed her harder. She pushed him off her and he tried to grab her hands but she was too fast. She gave him a sad look "Saor-" He was interrupted by confusion as she turned and ran out the door. 

She ran out of Angel cave, she noticed a lot of people were staring at her. Saoirse removed her sniper from her back and tossed it to Arcade. "Take care of my baby." She said to him running by. "What are you doing?" He said with a panicked look on his face. She turned and sprinted as fast as she could out of Angels Landing. 

_This way, I'm sure they landed here._

Saoirse dodged a few geckos on her way to the Southern passage, she was hiding behind a rock and glanced over to see multiple Enclave soldiers exit a landed ventibird. She then spotted a man in a tan coat and black boots. She could feel anger shoot a sharp pain in her chest. Saoirse wanted to make this quick, she took a deep breath and walked out from behind the rock with her arms up.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If anyone wants to connect my tumblr is owlisout, I reblog some fallout stuff on there. Also, my xbox one account for fallout 76 is LoneWanderer583 :p

Saoirse knew this day was coming, and in the back of her mind, there was still hope it wouldn't. 

_I can't let anyone else die because of me._

As Saoirse slowly walked towards the southern passage, it wasn't long till the soldiers spotted her. 

"That's far enough." Colonel Autumn said with a raised voice. 

Saoirse stopped just before the bridge, she had a brave determined look on her face. There were multiple soldiers all in black power armor aiming laser rifles at her, she could hear the sound of their rifles priming. 

She didn't want Autumn to have the satisfaction of ordering her around so she got on her knees and kept her hands behind her head. 

Autumn had smug look on his face, but Saoirse didn't notice and refused to look at him or any of the soldiers. She just looked at the valley right below the bridge, Saoirse had a mix of emotions going through her. 

She was happy none of her friends would be found and killed, she was far enough for the Enclave to just kill her and move on. 

She was sad she would never see her trustworthy friend Arcade again. That she won't see Joshua's crooked smile again or feel his arms wrap around her and nestled up to her in the middle of the night. 

What Saoirse regretted the most was never telling him how she felt. Hell, she only realized her feelings for him a few hours ago. She never expected to find love in the middle of nowhere, especially with another broken person. 

But she thought he could find someone better, someone more empathetic and happy. Saoirse thought back to his kiss, how perfectly her lips melded with is, the spark in her chest and the numbness in her legs when he embraced her. 

Saoirse would go through all the hell she went through the past few years if she could get the small moment back with him. 

She broke from her train of thought, it was silent for a moment besides the humming of the venti birds, "Retrieve the prisoner. I want to exterminate this piece of garbage myself." Colonel Autumn spat. "Looks like you're going to die a coward just like your father." 

Saoirse felt rage rise in her, she only wished she could avenge her father's death, but instead she was going to be killed by the person responsible for his death. 

She knew Colonel Autumn didn't pull a trigger, but if it wasn't for him her father would still be alive. Saoirse thought back to that terrible moment. 

****************************************************** 

"Dad, just do what he says! They are the government, they are here to help!" Saoirse said with her palms and arms resting on the glass, her panicked breath was fogging up the window. 

"I suggest you listen to your daughter, in order to prevent any more incidents." Colonel autumn said holstering his weapon. 

"Yes Colonel, I'll do whatever you want. There's no need for more violence." James said in defeat. "Give me a few moments to bring the system online." 

Saoirse felt relief hearing that her father was going to comply, her hands rested down at her sides and she waited for her father to finish. 

"Enough with these delays!" Autumn said impatiently. 

"Only a few more moments." James said. 

Suddenly, Saoirse was startled by the sudden bang and shaking of the institution. She balanced herself and fell into the glass. She saw all the soldiers in the chamber tense up and start to grunt. 

She saw her father limp the window slowly, lifting his hand up to hers and looked her in the eyes. 

_Run..run_

Saoirse didn't move, time slowed as she watched in horror as her father slowly slid his hand along with his body down the window and descended to the floor. She could hear the voice of a female yell something out and felt someone grab her waist and lifted her off the ground. 

Her eyes widened and she tried to grasp anything to stop from moving. 

"NOO!" She screamed 

She started to flail her arms and legs and another scream rang out of her mouth. 

"We need to save him! DAD!!" She yelled reaching out toward the chamber trying to grasp the railing with tears rolling down her face. 

Charon was carrying her away, she didn't understand why he was, she didn't care why she just wanted to get back to her father. 

He carried her through the door and everything went black. 

*****************************************

Saoirse heard footsteps come up from behind her, she hoped it was a yao guai coming to eat her instead of it being someone she cared about. 

She turned around and her eyes were blinded by the setting sun rays, she focused on a figure. 

She could feel a gasp of air escape her. 

It was him, she felt panic and wanted to cry, and at the same time, she was so happy to see him. Joshua didn't look at her as he was walking towards the bridge, he was looking at the Enclave. Joshua gave nod toward the Enclave. 

Saoirse felt nauseous, _No, he wouldnt have...._. 

She looked back at the enclave, Colonel Autumn was looking at Joshua with narrowed eyes. "Who the hell are you?!" Autumn said. He looked around at the officers, "What are you gagglefucks doing?! I gave you all an order!" 

Suddenly, all of the enclave soldiers pointed their laser rifles at Colonel Autumn in sync. Autumn turned to them and his eyes widened. He took a few steps away from them "What the fuck are you all doing!" He said. 

One soldier marched up to Autumn and grabbed his shoulder and pushed him on his knees. 

He looked back at one of the Enclave soldiers, "Branson, what the fuck is wrong with you!" He said. 

The enclave soldier removed his helmet, "I'm not Branson." Lewis said with a smug look. 

Autumn looked at the man in horror "Who- Where are my men!" He went on. 

Saoirse observed all of this with broad eyes, with her hands gradually slipping from her head and sitting on her calves. 

Without warning, she saw Joshua walk his way across the bridge and just as Autumn turned his head Joshua hit Autumn in the temple with the butt of his gun knocking him unconscious.

Saoirse saw Joshua look at the Enclave soldiers and heard an exchange of muffled words between them. She saw him turn to look at her, she froze. 

He started walking across the bridge towards her, she could feel 1000 cazadors in her chest and felt like she could scream in disbelief. 

Saoirse just sat the with her eyes wide and her mouth slightly agape. He kneeled down to her and placed his hand on the back on her head and kissed her forehead. He then looked in her eyes. 

_I told you to trust me._

**Author's Note:**

> Saoirse is also pronounced Sir-sha
> 
> Also, please be gentle, this is the first time I have ever written anything, ever. lol  
> (Hides under a rock)
> 
> Sorry for the surprise, I've decided I want to make this a series. So, my story is not over, but it may be a while before part two is up. I want to finish it completely before I publish it. :)


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